


DNL 44

by Distantyelling



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Tragedy, Avengers Tower, Bucky Barnes Feels, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Guilt, Hurt Bucky Barnes, Hurt/Comfort, Hydra (Marvel), Loki Feels, Lost Child, M/M, Mpreg, Odin is a dick, Pain, Past Mpreg, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), SHIELD, Stucky - Freeform, Sweet Steve Rogers, Tony and Bucky are friends now, stucky's son, stucky's son in love with loki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-11
Updated: 2019-12-27
Packaged: 2020-06-26 14:32:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,298
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19770211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Distantyelling/pseuds/Distantyelling
Summary: DNL 44 read the report.Healing rate higher than the asset. The injuries sustained were healed within three days. New blood samples taken.Suspected father – Steve Rogers.He is not a fool. He had a doubt before. It was a front page headline on every newspaper two years ago, when they got engaged. Steve Rogers and James Barnes, engaged to be married. This is the reason he was so valuable.He is their son.( A story of how DNL 44, a ruthless assassin trained by Hydra, found his parents, took a job  at S.H.I.E.L.D. and finally has a chance to be close to his parents, without telling them that he is the fugitive, they are looking for past four years. )





	1. DNL 44

**Author's Note:**

> This is a very old story that I wrote after Civil War but then Infinity War killed me. So, it's here now. Tell me what you guys think about it.

It was a magnificent sight, the helicarriers firing up with all their might, destroying each other. His first thought was _what a_ _waste_. It’s good that Hydra doesn’t know he can have thoughts of his own. Because if they did, he will be subjected to a much more extreme treatment than he is now. He was always different than the other winter soldiers. He learned twice as fast and had tons of more training than them. His success rate even higher than the Asset, whom he can see struggling in the hold of Captain America.

The logic that refused to leave his brain even after Hydra put him through years of brainwashing, tells him to go and help his comrade. But he can’t move on his own. He can do thinking as much he wants, but at the end of the day, he has to follow orders. It gets to them in different ways. Like for the Asset, its verbal commands. A series of carefully designed words that probably makes sense only to him. He gets his orders...well he doesn’t know. He just gets them somehow, just knows who to kill. He had been assigned as backup after the Asset started malfunctioning. The Asset was their Project Zero, the original winter soldier, the first one to be made and served as a test case for the others. He is the only one usable though, apart from him. The others they made, were too bloodthirsty, too lethal to control.

He saw the helicarrier they were on, sinking to the ground. His legs itch to move, go in and see the damage, see if the Asset even made it. But he couldn’t move. He had no orders. His previous orders were to be stationed at a vantage point, where he could see everything go down and if Project Zero malfunctions, then you complete his job. But the winter soldier did follow his orders. There was no malfunction. He saw him killing Captain America. Well not exactly, but after two gun shots, one stab wound and one hell of a fall that he took, that will be enough to kill even an enhanced. So, he kept waiting for his new set of orders. But they never came. He is trained to survive without food and water, even without sleep. He did a particular mission in a desert, which made him starve for 15 days. He didn’t remember the details, it’s something done to both of them after every mission.

 _Memory wipe_.

It doesn’t matter anyway, coz he is never awake for too long. He is always the second choice, on stand by if anything is to go wrong. It’s like waking up in a new life every time. The only thing constant is the blood, the gun in his hands and the killing. They keep him a secret from others too. One time, he heard that he is too valuable to use this frequently. He doesn’t know if he should feel proud at that. He doesn’t know if the things he did, are worth having pride. Killing is what he knows. And even if they tell him that he is shaping a century, helping mankind, he doesn’t feel like it. Must be the eyes of his victims, that scream fear when he is pointing his rifle on their foreheads. That look makes him uneasy. He can’t compare it to anything, given his life experience, but it surely wouldn’t have felt good to be one of those people, begging for mercy which he is unable to give.

For ten days he waited. Sitting in that abandoned building, looking outside for no reason, and waiting for his next order. It was unusual. He shouldn’t be awake for this long. His handler should’ve come by now to drug him and then put him in his box. On thirteenth day, he started squirming. It felt as if there was fire burning in every vein. He felt thirsty, it’s the kind of thirst he has never felt before. It feels too real. He tries to move, judges himself if he had to do anything else instead. When nothing comes, he gets up. His body is shaking, but he doesn’t know why. It’s the withdrawal, the drugs or maybe because there is no food in him. Right now, all he could think of is water. He is dressed up in his usual combat gear. He loses the vest and keeps one of his guns in his jacket pocket. Everything else feels too heavy. He bails his rifle, his knives, even his combat boots which have been tied up to his feet for so long; it had stopped his blood circulation and created angry red and blue lines on his feet. He gets out of the building which was his home for past thirteen days. The cleaning is still going on. The debris is getting cleared by some men in uniform. Even if it wasn’t too high, they did a lot of damage to the ground. Several shops were covered in temporary tarps. He looks around but it all feels so alien, roaming around without any target. To be honest, he doesn’t know what to do. He has never interacted with a civilian, hell he has never spoken anything else but ‘sir’ and ‘mission completed’.

“ You lost honey ?”, a voice brings him back and he looks to his side, a woman is looking at him from a small shop, tarp flying where the roof should have been. She is small, but her face has enough creases to tell him, that she must be more than 60. He doesn’t answer; he doesn’t know what to say. She comes out of her shop and walks up to him, really slow. His first instinct is to run, maintain your cover, and find a hideout. All the other things that Hydra drills in their every agent, but right now he is not very sure. His mind is all over the place, unsure of what to follow. The woman is only inches away now. She keeps looking at his face intently.

“ You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”, she gives him a gentle smile, and at this point he definitely knows that he doesn’t deserve it. She puts a hand on his shoulder, guides him inside the shop and he follows. She makes him sit ine one of the booths and then went inside the small kitchen that’s in the shop. She came back with a small mug, full of something that is brown and hot.

“ Here you go, you look like you can use some coffee.”, she handed him the mug and went inside again.

Coffee, that’s what she called it. He smelled it. His dry throat making his brain go numb and giving him a green light to consume whatever this is. He takes a sip and his eyes closed at the sensation. He has never tasted anything so good before. He has actually never tasted anything with taste before. All he was given was water, some strange mush in a plate and a syringe full of important nutrients for his body. He drinks it all greedily, without giving himself a break, even if his tongue got a little burnt. He didn’t even realise that he was crying. The tears in his eyes have only appeared once before, when he was administered with a healing gel that was almost solid, sitting calmly in a syringe. It was extremely painful and even if he didn’t scream, he cried for an hour straight because of the burning it caused. Since then, he associated them with pain, but now he is having his doubts at the concept. The woman came back and saw him crying. He has no idea what the protocol is for a social situation like this.

“ Oh dear, what’s wrong ?”, she wiped his tears and he wants to curse her kindness, coz its making him cry even more. When he didn’t answer, she just enclosed him in a hug.

“ It’s okay, it’s all going to be okay.”, she rubbed soothing circles on his back while he laid limp in her arms, breathing heavily.

“ What’s your name boy ?”, she asked.

“ DNL 44.”, he mumbled, while sniffing rest of the tears away.

“ Okay, Daniel Ferrero is it? Let’s hand out these coffees to those nice men out there. They have been working hard since morning for the cleanup.

And he did.

**Two years later**

“ I’ve got the supplies Grandma.”, he yelled while he came inside with so many brown bags in his hands.

“ Oh good God, I was thinking you got lost at the docks again.”, she came out walking slowly.

“ That was one time, are you never going to let that go ?”, he asked while putting supplies for the cafe. Annie Jenkins aka Grandma had a small cafe that now had a real roof instead of a tarp. Two years ago, he got accidentally roped into Mrs. Jenkins’ life and it’s the best thing that has ever happened to him. He can’t say the same for her though. After handing out coffees to the cleanup crew, he collapsed and started having some sort of seizure. He was taken in by the ambulance standing near the site for emergency purposes. It didn’t take long for him to recover, and he politely dodged the whole let’s take you to the hospital thing, which she thought was because he was a user. Because when she brought him back to her shop, she started consoling him about how he shouldn’t look for comfort in syringes but in real people. He didn’t deny it because the story worked in his favour. If he has to figure out how to survive without Hydra, he will need something. She took care of him for weeks, while he was going through all sorts of withdrawal. He didn’t know how to thank her for that. So, he worked in the cafe. It takes a big heart and an awful lot of blind trust to do what Grandma was doing for him. He understood that now. Even though he has no idea how these things work. He learned by the day, saw everything and imitated with flawless efficiency. Learned the names of food and drinks served in the cafe and turned out he could do the job of taking orders well.

Maybe, because that is what he has always done in the past.

Took orders from Hydra, didn’t question, completed the job. The difference here is that he isn’t put in a cryo freeze afterwards. It was difficult in the start though. He wouldn’t understand what people said, mostly because he was used to of getting his commands in Russian. But he got over it. Hydra was right. He did learn real fast. He would remember the price of every drink by heart, could recite all the ingredients of every delicacy their cafe served. Bless Mrs. Jenkins’ heart for thinking, that he was slow in the start because he was adjusting in a drug free life, which wasn’t a total lie.

Now, after two years, he is still working here without pay. When she handed him his salary the first time, he was confused. She explained that he was working here for the whole month without being sick or absent, which gives him a 30 working day salary. She also said, that it was very less than what he would get somewhere else. He stared at the 700 dollars in his hand and then looked at her again.

“ I don’t know what to do with this.”, he looked at her helplessly.

“ You can do anything you want dear, except buying crack because I will smother you in your sleep if you do that.”, he laughed. It’s still weird for him to do laughing and crying and smiling at the customers, but he enjoys it. He sighs thinking, that she doesn’t know how hard it will be to kill him in his sleep. He probably has 135 ways to dodge that. But he doesn’t tell her that.

“ Keep it for me. I have all what I need, right here.”, he said this instead. She smiled at him and accepted his request. He lived in her garage and she would cook for them at night. He was content with what he had. Until one day, he saw the news on the small TV in the cafe.

It was a nice day and there were good number of customers in the shop. He just got the supplies and went inside the kitchen, where Mrs. Jenkins was working.

“ How’s my girlfriend ?”, he yelled, her hearing isn’t as crisp as it was two years ago.

“ One of these days, you will have to get a real girlfriend you know. I can’t be your girlfriend forever Daniel.”, he chuckled at the name which she gave to him, without even knowing.

“ What are you talking about, you look as beautiful as Caroline from 2 broke girls.”, he kissed her on the cheek, something he learned from seeing all the TV shows at their home.

“ As beautiful ? I am clearly more beautiful than her.”, she snickered. Daniel knows she is joking but he still played along. It was their morning routine. He would bring supplies, she would cook and he would take the orders at the counters, calling their names as the orders were done. It was the same as everyday but then he saw the commotion between customers, who were all huddled around the TV. He got out of the counter and saw the news.

**Winter soldier responsible for the Vienna bombing.**

He saw the smoke and the building. The reporter giving out counts of how many people died. News channels were circulating his face everywhere. He trembled at seeing the face after two years, whom he thought was dead. He should’ve known better. He was a fool to believe that Hydra was done with them. If they activated the soldier again, then it’s only a matter of time that they activate him too.

“ What’s going on son ?”, he looked at Mrs. Jenkins, who was standing next to him now.

Of course, he was a fool to think that he can start a new life. Now, he has put Mrs. Jenkins in danger too. What if they activate him and he kills her ? He can’t do that. He has to go away.

But he doesn’t want to. She is the only thing he has in his life, which is worth living. She saved him. She gave him a family, even if it wasn’t his. Her two sons and their families came for Christmas to her house and she introduced him as if he was one of her own. They were so happy that she finally hired someone. He enjoyed those three days like it was all he was gonna get. The festivals, the food, the hugs and presents which included the hoodie, he is wearing right now. It all felt like a blessing. It was a perfect life. He doesn’t have anything else to know the difference.

He remains distracted for the whole day, doesn’t give his usual smile to customers and when he reached home, he switched on the TV in Grandma’s living room and started watching.

“ Honey, get your soup.”, she yelled from the kitchen counter, but he didn’t even respond. He was completely engrossed in the channel saying that Captain America is now an international fugitive. He wasn’t an idiot. After the whole incident in DC, he researched Captain America, who was initially the reason of the Asset’s malfunction. He was actually his childhood friend. There was a lot of information about them on the web. He found out that project zero was actually James Buchanan Barnes, who fell from a train during a mission and was called a martyr for his exceptional services, well before turning into a stone cold killer. It made him feel disgusted with Hydra. He always knew, there was something wrong with the organisation. But reading about Barnes made his heart ache. The man had his past practically ripped off from him. He is thankful that he doesn’t have any memories of his past. He isn’t sure if he even has a past. All he knows was that one day, he woke up in a facility, there was snow outside and he was told that he needs to train. He remembers himself as a teenager back then. After that, he lost count when he woke up and what year it was. The memories of his missions came back eventually and he researched everything he could about them. It was the second time he cried because the people he killed were innocent. Well, maybe not completely because many of them were politicians and high level government officials but they had family, a life which he didn’t give them a chance to complete. It was then that he decided, he would never visit his past like this ever again. It was painful enough to remember their faces like it was engraved in his soul. He wonders though if winter soldier remembers them too. He is the only one in this whole world, who knows how he feels. The news did give him the relief that he is alive. If Captain America survived then obviously he did too. But Hydra alive and kicking didn’t make him happy. He will have to leave. There is no other option.

“ You never watch news.”, his thinking train stopped to see Grandma standing near him.

“ Uhm...it’s just. Sit down, I will bring dinner.”, he went back to the kitchen and brought the tray of food and their soup. He started nibbling on his food, eyes still on the ground. She switched off the TV and he didn’t even notice.

“ Okay, what’s going on honey?”, she spoke in a soft voice. He looked at her for a moment, thinking about the past two years.

“ I have to go.”, he whispered, tears threatening to spill. She sighed and closed her eyes.

“ I knew this day would come.”, she sat silently while he kept gathering courage to say more.

“ You never asked anything about me, about my parents, my friends, my job. Why ?”, he wanted to know. She smiled at him, like she had done so many times before, the knowing smile. When she would just know that he was the one, who ate all the Oreos. It’s not his fault though. He discovered that he has a big appetite than other people. And even though he was super careful in stealing food, she would always know. But she never said anything to him.

“ You see boy, when you reach my age, you know how people are by just looking at them.”, she put her hand on his hair and put them aside from his eyes.

“ How did I look?”, Daniel took every word of hers as a gospel of truth. She was his teacher for everything and will probably always be.

“ Lost, when I first saw you. But then, you turned into this wonderful man that I always knew you were capable of.”, she kissed his forehead and ruffled his hair in appreciation, making him smile.

“ There are ....things that I have done in my past life, that are unforgivable. My hands, my very soul, it’s all so dirty that it’s not redeemable.”, he said, a single tear escaping as he closed his eyes. Mrs. Jenkins gulped, there was flicker of fear in her eye but it went away as fast as it came.

“ What you did in the past, was it by choice ?”, she asked, somehow always able to pick the right question.

“ No, I wish I could undo it, all of it, but I can’t. I do know for sure that I will do anything but go back to that life Grandma.”, he covered his face with his hands. She held him by his shoulders and brought him face to face.

“ Then that’s enough. Sometimes, the only way to ease our pain is to ease someone else’. What you endured, it only made you stronger. You don’t have to go back honey. You can always make sure that no one else falls for the same trap.”, he smiled at her through his tears. He knows, she is still thinking his worst crimes along the lines of stealing and drug abuse.

He kept thinking the whole night. What she said made absolute sense. He can never rest, knowing that Hydra is still out there, waiting for the right moment to make use of him.

Not anymore.

She is right. The only way he can live his life is to destroy Hydra from inside out, to make sure no one else becomes their victim like Sergeant Barnes, whose entire existence was stained by their lies. He can’t put the few people he loves in danger. Instead, he will uproot them, demolish their very being that they will be sorry they made him.

Next morning, he packed a small bag, which was obviously borrowed; he put his few belongings and asked Grandma for all the money that is left in his account. He kissed her goodbye, saying that he is going to do what she said and that he will keep in touch. He also told her not to call him, making something up and hugged her fiercely.

And then he started on his mission, this time without anyone’s order. No more following commands. This time, he is following his own path.


	2. Bucky Barnes has a new life

Bucky woke up to the soft snoring of his fiancé. He got up and disentangled a very groggy Steve Rogers from himself and started his coffee pot. It was his day off after a long stressful week. He kept seeing Steve from the kitchen, the bedroom door open for that sole purpose. He smiled at the sight of his soon to be husband, rolled up in sheets like a burrito and mouth slightly open. Sometimes, Bucky had to pinch himself just to make sure that he is not dreaming, that he is still not in that hell hole of a facility where Alexander Pierce tortured him. It was a rough ride after Zemo framed him for the blast, which he had no part in. The most painful thing to overcome was the awkward tension between Tony and him. To be honest, if Bucky was in his place, he wasn’t sure he would’ve overcame the fact the he murdered his parents. It took them a lot of time, but now after four years, they have become good co-workers, friends on some good days. Tony did all the work though.

“ Cap needs both of us in his life Buckabee. I am willing to bridge the gap if you are. Coz you know that star spangled man gonna get himself killed without us.”, Tony said with a struggling smile and Bucky laughed because its 100 percent true. Steve Rogers is many things but self preservative, he is not.

“ I will do my best Stark. I don’t want him to lose the friends he made.”, Tony’s warm attitude didn’t stop Bucky from apologising often. It was when Tony’s daughter Morgan was born and he introduced Bucky as uncle terminator, he realised that Tony had actually forgiven him. He swore on that moment, that he will protect Morgan with all he has got. Tony even let him babysit Morgan, which was a huge gesture of faith on his part. And it’s not like he has no experience with kids. He had two baby sisters, who were a major pain in the ass. And Steve and Nat were basically useless with kids, so it was either Bucky or Sam from the team. And it gave Bucky something to do when he has no missions.

Kids were a sensitive topic for them. When they got engaged two years ago, Bucky talked once about it. Steve wanted to have kids which were a good sign but Bucky thought, that maybe they should give their engagement a grace period. Steve was heartbroken but Bucky explained that they should understand each other first, living together and judging themselves, if they were even ready.

So when after a year, Bucky said that maybe they should try and start a family together, Steve was over the moon. Their happiness faded a little when it didn’t happen right away. Bruce said to give it sometime, explained how it’s difficult for some couples the first time. But all Bucky could think was that he is the reason. He isn’t assuming this. He has a huge scar on his lower stomach, which hasn’t healed even if he had the serum in his veins. Worse injuries have been healed by his body but that scar refuses to budge. He asked Banner to tell him if something’s wrong. He worried that Hydra did something to his body. But he told him the same thing, every time he examined his womb.

“ There is nothing wrong with your body Bucky. You just have to be patient.”, he would give him one of his empathetic smiles and send him back. Even Steve would console him but Bucky knows, it hurts him equally.

His morning calm was short lived when his phone started ringing. He grimaced at the awful timing and picked up.

“ You and Cap need to come in. Another Hydra base is off the map.”, Sam’s voice boomed from the speaker.

“ Who the hell are these people, who keep doing our job for us?”, he huffed in frustration.

It started after he moved in with Steve in the compound. It was after three months since Vienna bombing. A particular Hydra base near D.C. was destroyed completely. Steve went on the site and described it, as if it was bombed through and through in every corner. Whoever did that, left no traces. They couldn’t even speculate how many of them did this. their tracks were expertly covered. It is a mystery till today.

After that, it became a regular occurrence. They will get news in a month or two about some other explosion or a mass murder and even though Bucky had no remorse over their deaths, he would still feel uncomfortable about whoever was doing this. he teamed up with Natasha on the case and studied the pattern which was different for every bombing or murder, almost as if done on purpose. The technique though was very similar to hydra itself, which twisted the case further.

Hydra operatives are extremely loyal. There is no chance that they will betray their so called cause. They are trained to an extreme, where everything your superior says is a command and if you are not following it willingly, then you are made to follow them by torture and brainwash.

Like Bucky.

Which is why, the case itself didn’t make any sense. He was the only winter soldier that worked. The others were killed by Zemo and even though there were a few of them, they were never used because of Hydra’s lack of control over their actions. Apart from that, no one has the ability to carry out such operation alone. Which brought them to a conclusion, that it is a team.

But their conclusion failed, when a sixteen year old Yelena Belova was saved from one of the bombing site. Not saved, more like she was waiting for them, when they reached there. She was covered in dust and soot but was unharmed physically. It took Nat three months to get the whole story from her.

She described the attacker as a 6 ft 2 inches tall man, with a ski mask and goggles, covered in black combat gear. Nat kept digging for information, asking if there was anyone else, but the girl was definite that he was alone.

“ He asked me to grab his hand and then we ran out. He took me near the tree and then we saw it all burn. He left three minutes before you arrived, saying that my ride is here.”, she sobbed while telling the whole story again. They still didn’t believe her though, specially Bucky. This was an impossible task to do alone. Yelena must’ve missed something.

He woke up Steve and he grumbled. But they dressed quickly and boarded the jet despite how tired they were. It’s one of the longest running cases they have for past four years, they have to.


	3. Discoveries and dilemmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Daniel finally gets his truth.

Four painful years.

He has been doing this for past four years without any rest. He understood early on that the mission he took is bigger than he anticipated. Hydra had its root grown deep and just like its name, two more grew at a different place once he would wipe one of them. The job was thankless and tiring. Finding out their hideouts, labs, training facilities and then burning them to the ground, freeing the prisoners but making sure they do not see him. Except one Yelena Belova, because he didn’t know that she was there. Covering his tracks, so that the new S.H.I.E.L.D. wouldn’t find him and keeping his techniques different every time, so that ex Hydra operatives like Winter Soldier and Natasha Romanoff won’t find him. He found out a lot useful info on the way though. Like how he gets his orders from Hydra. The first base he raided was his own, the one in D.C. where he was kept. Even though Shield had already swept the place, there were few things even they wouldn’t know, like the backup drive hidden at every base for keeping the information safe. He found it hidden in the floor panels, but couldn’t find out what’s in it, until he raided his next target and stole an efficient Hydra computer. It had a Shield logo engraved on it because half of the Shield was infiltrated by Hydra. It gave him a benefit of being hidden too. He can’t walk everywhere, showing that he has a Hydra computer. So, he printed a fake Shield ID card too. He removed the GPS and then used the drive to look up the information. He kept lying to himself that he doesn’t care about his past, about his parents, where he was born. But every time he found some new piece of information, he wished it was about him. Thankfully, the backup drive told him that he has a charge placed in his tooth that works as a neurotransmitter. He had to remove it himself and then smashed it under his foot, making himself free from Hydra’s control. He went out that day and drank at a bar to celebrate, even though he couldn’t get drunk.

There were nights where he would think about all the people he killed. It made his heart ache, even though he would try to convince himself that it was for the good of this world. Each Hydra agent he killed, made something in his heart grow deeper and he won’t understand why. But he kept going with a new enthusiasm, to set people free. So that they can feel the same happiness he did. It took him a long time but he removed 67 Hydra bases off the map. Now the last one is in Siberia. Not because he had destroyed them all but because that’s his last lead. He struck at a time when Hydra was at its weakest. All that left was some low level leaders, who are trying to salvage whatever is left. He has no doubt that it will rise again, but he will be ready. For now, he has to be satisfied at this false victory.

If he ignores the fact why he is here, the landscape he is looking at is quite beautiful. There are two separate Hydra bases here which are the oldest. One is already destroyed by Tony Stark’s iron man and Winter soldier’s fight. Going there was a formality, only to retrieve few hidden things like ammunition, hard drives etc.

The other base was far away from that and a little older than the last one. It took him a lot of time to get in, since it was buried in snow and the locks were old. He fired three shots from his shotgun and broke the lock. The moment he entered, it felt like he hit a jackpot. This was not an operation base. It was an old archive, full of files and computers, a lot of old machinery. It basically looked like a dump, but for Daniel it was precious than gold. He took his laptop out and started on the computers first, loading all the data and using decryption software he fashioned himself. While his computer did the work, he started on the old files stored in the room. Thank God it was alphabetical or else he wouldn’t find anything. He started with D and removed all the files from the shelf, looking for his. After looking through the stack in sheer excitement, he was extremely disappointed. There was no file named DNL 44. He sat down with a sigh, not knowing what to do. No matter how much he convinced himself that he is doing this for greater good, that his mission isn’t self centered, that he is removing scum like Hydra from the earth, he would still hope to find something for himself. Doesn’t he deserve a little bit for himself. He didn’t want much. He just wanted to know where he came from, what his truth is.

His computer beeped after a while, making him stand up. He removed the connection from the main computer and started packing up his belongings. But before leaving, he walked back to the shelf and got out files from J.

So what if he can’t get his closure. Maybe he could help someone else. That’s what Grandma told him to do, to ease the pain. And he is in a lot of pain right now.

He sorted through the old files and finally found it.

**JAMES B. BARNES 1944.**

He smiled at the file and packed it in his bag. He shot the computers with his gun and built a pyre of the remaining files, setting them on fire. His work is almost done.

* * *

Steve was the first to come out of the jet, Bucky, Natasha and Sam following him. The place brought back a lot of uncomfortable memories, his fight with Tony, Bucky’s disintegrated arm, the video that created all the mess etc etc. Even though they are at a different base, the scenery is almost the same in the snow.

“ So when you say off the map, usually it means the base was burnt to the ground.”, Bucky was looking with curiosity at the building still intact.

“ I know. I thought the same, but clearly.”, Sam made wild flailing gestures with his hands.

“ What if it’s a trap? This is the first time he has left something untouched.”, Natasha joined in.

“ You mean them?”, Bucky interrupted.

“ I mean him and it’s not a work of a team.”, she looked at him while he rolled his eyes.

“ Shield already did a sweep, so far no traps.”, Sam added and they all went in. Steve was already looking at the computers which were shot through their innards. Bucky reached near the ashes, few small pieces of burnt paper still left. He suddenly stood up and went out of the base. Steve followed him, leaving the rest inside to investigate.

“ You okay?”, Steve walked up to Bucky, who was staring the snow. When he didn’t get an answer, he just held him by his shoulders, making him lean for a hug.

“ They did it on purpose. They burnt the records.”, he said in a heavy voice.

“ It’s gonna be okay Buck.”, Steve sighed. No matter how much Bucky tried, in some way, Hydra always reminded him that he is two steps behind. It took Steve a lot of time to convince him that Hydra can’t get to him anymore. Even after Shuri removed the trigger words and Tony made a new arm for him, which was free of surveillance. Bucky still wanted in on every Hydra case, just to find out if their main objective is to find him. He knows he is of no use to them now, but there is a constant fear in a corner of his mind, that they will tear him off this new life he made for himself.

“ The file you got from Natasha, it was just a snippet. There is a lot more and I don’t remember all of it. I just wish I could get all my memories back somehow.”, he ran his hand through his hair in frustration. They are shorter now, neatly trimmed at the sides and longer in the front.

“ I know, it sucks. But what we have here is better than anything else right? It’s a first solid lead after four years.”, Steve looked at the building again.

“ You won’t find anything in there Steve, just like last time. The sole purpose of this is to remove Hydra’s history from the books. Anything left will work against them don’t you think.”, Bucky said.

“ You keep saying them. Yelena told us there was no one else there.”, Steve looked at him sadly. Bucky was the only one still not convinced that its one man’s job.

“ How many people in Shield can do this operation alone ?”, Bucky asked simply.

“ No one. I can do it, but even I would need eyes somewhere.”, he said thinking intently.

“ Exactly, that’s the same for Hydra, no one can carry out something this big alone, except for one.”, Bucky said looking down.

“ You.”, Steve understood now.

“ Yes, and if I am not doing this than who is. CIA, FBI, MI6, even Interpol has consulted us on this. Every enforcement agency has given up. Hell, we have the best intelligence and still can’t find a single lead. So either Hydra made something even better than me or it’s a group of people who seriously want entire Hydra dead. We know it’s not the first option so obviously it’s the second.”, Bucky explained in bitter words.

“ Or maybe we are not looking deep enough.” Steve said.

“ It’s possible, but I can’t do the investigation alone. With Nat on the field, I am the only one left.”, he sighed.

“ Maybe we should get someone from Shield in our team. What about Sharon ?”, Steve suggested but Bucky’s glare was enough to tell him not to.

“ Well if Sharon is okay then Loki is too.”, Bucky smirked. This time Steve glared at him. Bucky never imagined that he would like Loki so much. His father sent him on earth to pay for his crimes in New York, with a weird anklet that would restrain his magic and forced him to help Shield with their daily perils. Bucky and Peter are the only people Loki tolerates willingly.

“ I will get the word out. I am sure we will find someone.” Steve smiled, which Bucky returned.

* * *

Daniel was sitting on his bed with his laptop on. He was looking at all the archival footage that he received and so far, it only made his blood boil. The experiments, rigorous training, beating little girls into discipline, all sorts of inhumane practices made his breath hitch. It was all randomly named, so he had no clue which video file had what. His eyes kept going to his backpack, to Winter soldier’s file. He wanted to see inside but it didn’t feel right, as if he was invading his privacy.

After few more videos, he couldn’t watch enough. He wished that he could kill them all over again. He closed his eyes and sighed, finally picking up the folder in his backpack, after he gave up resisting. It might be the biggest one apart from the Maximoff twins, which he got from Sokovia. He decided he will send it to James Barnes. But before he could stop himself, he opened it and started reading.

**_Test subject_ ** _: James B. Barnes 32557038_

**_Prisoner Sr. No_ ** _.: 56898_

**_D.O.B._ ** _: MARCH 10 1917_

**_Retrieved_ ** _: 1943_

**_History and physical conducted by:_ ** _Dr. Ernim Zola_

**_Source_ ** _: U.S. citizen, 107 th, army, Sgtt. Barnes_

**_Drug administration_ ** _: level C_

**_Case history:_ ** _administered drug level c, subject shows signs of physical weakness, suffering from hallucinations. Blood test does not show any effect. Subject recites his badge no. 32557038, shows signs of violence. Panic attacks when sees the syringe. Currently subdued._

**_Status:_ ** _missing_

Missing, of course. Everyone knows the story till here. After that Steve Rogers led a one man rescue mission and saved lives of so many soldiers, including Barnes. He turned the page and saw the next paper.

**_Resumed:_ ** _James B. Barnes 32557038 (refer to page 1)_

Daniel huffed at Hydra’s antiques. They diminished the value of a human being into page numbers. He started reading ahead.

**_24.07.1944_ **

_Subject has shown exceptional healing tendencies. Left arm is missing, result of the fall; affected area is infected but has started to heal._

The left arm, everybody knows the Winter soldier has a cybernetic arm. He obviously broke the fall by his left hand.

**_30.07.1944_ **

_Current blood tests show that the drugs are working. The WBC count has accelerated. The healing is much faster._

Yeah tell me about it, he thought. It’s the same drugs for all winter soldiers in the start. He has studied enough of their files to know that. He skipped next entry. Already knowing what will be in it.

**_11.08.1944_ **

_Subject is kept in induced sleep. The wounds of the left arm have healed almost completely. The fetus is doing well._

He stopped. He read the entry again.

Fetus ?

Did he just read fetus ?

What the hell ?

He quickly went back to the entry he skipped.

**05.08.1944**

Subject is kept in induced sleep. Blood tests show low level of RBCs. 3 months 2 days old fetus detected.

He closed the file for a moment and took a deep breath. Every time he thinks it can’t get any worse and every time he is proved wrong. These are not people. They are monsters. James Barnes was pregnant when he fell from the train. This is horrible. Daniel had so many questions racing in his mind.

Did he know?

Did the baby survive?

Who was the father?

He took a deep breath and opened the file again. God, he wished he would’ve just left it alone.

_3 months 2 days old fetus detected. The delay in healing is caused by the pregnancy, securing the fetus first. No heartbeat yet._

He quickly read the next few entries, which kept saying the same things until...

**_17.09.1944_ **

_Subject is kept in induced coma. Drug level D. Fetus’ heartbeat detected for the first time. Growth rate unaffected, despite the host being in coma. The current age of fetus:_

_ 4 _ _months 14 days 12 hours year 1944, hence now called –_

_D-------N-------L------------44_

Daniel stopped reading, his lips quivered while he read those words again and again.

DNL 44

It’s him.

Winter soldier’s child.

His son.

He is James Buchanan Barnes’s son.

He felt like he couldn’t breath, which is impossible because whatever Hydra did to him, made him immune to any kind of disease or infection. His heart felt impossibly full. He has a real family. He has a father.

SHIT!

His father is world’s most dangerous assassin.

A tear escaped his eye. He was there, he was looking at him getting beaten up and didn’t do anything. If he would’ve died that day, Daniel would’ve never forgiven himself. He kept searching for his past, not knowing that it was with him all along. They were being used by Hydra together, their lives manipulated for their own selfish motives.

Oh God... he is 73 years old.

He knew that cryo freeze stopped his age time to time. But now, he knows his exact age. That’s something. Is that why he doesn’t have a separate file ? He started reading, skipping the repetitive entries again.

**_20.01.1945_ **

_Subject is physically weak. The new drug level E isn’t compatible with current condition. Vitals are not at optimum level. DNL 44 is developing well. Current weight 7.2 lbs._

Why wouldn’t he? He is sucking up all the energy his father has in his comatose body. Daniel gathered courage and continued.

**_22.01.1945_ **

_DNL 44 delivered via emergency C section, 13 days before due date._

_Parent I – James. B. Barnes_

_Parent II - Unknown_

_Current weight – 7.3 lbs_

_Height – 59 cms_

_Gender – Male_

_Hair color – Brown_

_Eye color – Blue_

_Introduced to milk supplements._

He sees the date on the entry. That’s his birthday. He has a birthday now. How many times he had to lie to Mrs. Jenkins in different ways. He said he doesn’t celebrate his birthday, so it’s pointless. But she insisted for a long time before giving up. He thought many times to just lie about it, but it didn’t feel right. Maybe he didn’t want to add to the pile of lies Hydra already told him. Now he knows his birthday, he can even see his horoscope. He smiled stupidly at the thought. Horoscope, yeah that’s the important thing right now. He read ahead.

**_25.01.1945_ **

_Subject clinically dead. Revived twice. Vitals stable. 7 units of blood transfusion. Surgical C section wound infected. 24 hours under observation._

His heartbeat escalated after reading. Clinically dead. Winter solder, no, his father died twice. Even though he knows he is alive, the information made him cry. He sometimes thought how he had suffered so much, but seeing what they had done to his father made his heart shatter. Even in a coma, he managed to bring him in this world. His own body suffered, while he thrived inside him. His tears were falling on the yellowed paper of the file. He quickly wiped it clean.

**_28.01.1945_ **

_Subject stable. Awake for two hours. Suffering temporary amnesia. Put in induced coma._

_DNL 44 subjected to induced coma. Drug level zero_

What?

So that’s why he doesn’t remember anything. He has no memories of his childhood, because he had none. He grew in a coma. His life was a controlled experiment for Hydra. They didn’t even bother to give him a name. It made him furious. They ruined his life. They ruined his father’s life. He never had a chance at anything normal because a bunch of scientists decided, that he has to be a killing machine.

He started reading ahead, how he was kept awake just for few days to ensure his physical tests are coming okay. How he was trained when he reached 16 and first time put in cryo freeze just like his father. He kept reading and the horrors didn’t end. Every page spat out something worse and he would gasp at his terrible destiny. Until he found something, that gave his existence even more concrete meaning.

He was sent on a mission in 1965. A civil rights activist was killed from a long range rifle in Philadelphia. He remembered it. The woman had blond hair and was leading a rally, when he shot her between her eyes. The building he was in, was surrounded by police team and he jumped from 32nd floor. He was never severely injured on a job before. He read the report.

_Healing rate higher than the asset. The injuries sustained were healed within three days. New blood samples taken. Suspected father – Steve Rogers._

It was a front page headline on every newspaper two years ago when they got engaged. Steve Rogers and James Barnes, engaged to be married. This is the reason he was so valuable. He is their son. He has the same serum in his body that made skinny and sick Steve Rogers into the American war hero, the same drugs that made Sergeant Barnes a ruthless assassin. He laughed at his life story which Hydra made into a joke. How different everything would’ve been if they had survived this. He knows who his parents are but he can’t do anything about it. They don’t even know they have a child. Or maybe they do?

All the ‘ifs and buts’ kept him awake. He is in Siberia, miles away from his parents. It’s funny how easily he had accepted everything. He can’t help but fear that his identity will be taken from him again. He has no game plan, no further targets. Maybe he can try to find them, maybe only see them from afar. He needs something, anything to keep him going. So, he packed his bags and left the room.

* * *

Steve was completely exhausted and in zero mood to fly 10 hours back to New York in a cramped up jet. Luckily everybody else agreed with him. So now at 10 pm, he was standing at the reception, waiting for his keys. He was looking something on his phone, when he accidentally bumped into someone.

“ Fuck.”, the man said as the computer in his hand fell on the ground. He sat down in a hurry, looking if it got damaged. Steve sat down too to help him.

“ Sorry. I didn’t see you.”, Steve said, but stopped when he looked at the Shield logo on his laptop. The guy stood up, still fussing with his computer.

“ No problem, happens to the best of us.”, he looked up and froze.

Because standing in front of him was his father Steve Rogers. He wished he could meet them as fast as possible, but not this fast . He wasn’t even blinking. Steve, his Dad was looking at him with confusion.

“ You alright son?”, Steve asked.

Son? Oh if he had any idea how true that is. He composed himself the best he could and mustered a small smile, heart beating like crazy.

“ Yeah, I am just exhausted.”, he said in a low voice, still not getting a hold of the wavering that remains. Steve looked at his laptop.

“ You work for Shield? ”, Steve pointed at the laptop.

Crap, what he thought to be an advantage, is now going to get him in a lot of trouble. He had to quickly decide a cover, without any loopholes. His training comes handy in that. It’s obvious they are here to investigate the Hydra base he raided. They have been tailing his work for years.

“ Yes Sir, undercover for past six months. I was the one who reported the activity at the base. I am Daniel Ferrero.”, he moved his hand forward in confidence, yet his heart thudding like crazy.

“ Steve Rogers, but I am guessing you already know that.”, he smiled while shaking his hand.

“ Well who doesn’t. I was just leaving. Nice to meet you.”, he said with a proper smile this time. God, he just shook hands with his father. If happiness had a face, he is wearing it right now.

“ Steve, what’s taking so long?”, he turned around to see who interrupted his precious moment.

It was the asset

The Winter soldier.

The one who brought him into this world.

His other father.

Daniel has done so many missions in the past four years and seen unimaginable things. The difference from before was that he could feel things. He would see the state of the prisoners and get angry. He cried when Yelena held his hand and asked him not to leave him. But he kept himself strong.

But seeing James Barnes in front of him, his training failed him. He never needed this much strength to control his tears before.

“ Sorry Buck. Meet Daniel. He was the one leading undercover, here for past six months.”, Steve introduced him. Bucky gave him a smile and shook his hand. Daniel gave him the biggest smile ever.

“ Leading already huh. How old are you?”, Bucky asked. Daniel’s first thought was 73, but he stopped himself.

“ 28, started at 24 in Shield. Worked in intelligence for two years.”, he opted intelligence because he is pretty sure they are far away from that department. Captain America, Black widow, Sam Wilson, they all work in the field. That’s the best he could do if he had to create his fake identity in freaking 30 seconds.

“ Really ? Did you lie on your form like Steve did?”, Bucky smirked. He knows he doesn’t look 28. He barely looks 22. He got the joke which was a relief about how Steve, his father lied to get in the army.

“ Where are you headed?”, Steve asked.

“ New York.”, it slipped before he could stop himself. New York, because I was going to look for you and then watch you from afar like a creep or maybe introduce myself to you as an insurance agent or something.

“ Come with us then. We will leave tomorrow morning.”, Bucky offered.

Crap

He is so doomed.

“ Uh, I don’t know, I don’t want to be a bother really.”, run you idiot.

“ Wouldn’t have offered if it was. Plus you lived here for six months. I bet you know where to get dinner ?”, Bucky said genuinely. He didn’t imagine he would be this nice in person. All those terrible things that Hydra did couldn’t change who his father was. They are avengers, deal with all kind of things at work, but here they are, ready to offer lift to a stranger. The right action should be to decline the offer nicely and leave. But Daniel didn’t have that much resolve left to do things properly. He is in front of his parents; he was bound to get greedy.

“ Cool. Meet me in the lobby in 15.”, he said and then went to his room, quickly getting out his laptop. Okay, fifteen minutes to hack Shield database.

* * *

Food is something he had a real interest in ever since he escaped Hydra’s clutches. Everywhere he goes, he tries something new, learns about it in details and even looks the recipe on the web. He tried cooking a little when he was with Mrs. Jenkins and he was getting pretty good at it too. But when he left, it all stopped. You don’t get time to cook when you are plotting murder of your former co-workers.

Their hotel was in Tomsk so he took them to this small diner that served simple Russian food. Only Steve and Bucky joined in, the rest were really tired to go anywhere. Sometimes super strength has its perks.

“ I have no idea what to get?”, Steve was extremely confused to see the names of several dishes.

“ Neither do I.”, Bucky looked as puzzled as Steve, which surprised him.

“ I thought you would know Russian food, you know because...”, he trailed off, not sure if he should complete. Their time with Hydra isn’t exactly dinner table talk. For a moment, he thought he ruined it but then he saw Bucky smiling, he breathed in relief.

“ Food was the last thing they thought about.”, he could see how Steve subtly shifted his hand and placed it over Bucky’s. He couldn’t help but smile to see them, his parents, so in love. Seeing how clueless they were about food, he ordered a bunch of things, Rice pilaf, some Piroshki, Borscht and Beef stroganoff. He knows it wouldn’t be wasted because there were three enhanced people sitting on the table.

“ This is heavenly.”, Steve took a spoonful of rice pilaf and moaned.

“ So what’s next for you?”, Bucky asked while sipping on his beetroot soup.

“ I don’t know. I will get my orders when I get back.”, he said convincingly.

“ Not going home?”, Steve asked.

I don’t have one. He was going to visit Mrs. Jenkins before his lost family made appearance in Hydra’s documents. He missed grandma so much and even if he was going to visit only for a few days, he wished he went to her first, so that she will tell him what to do.

“ Not much to go back to. Parents are dead, Grandma is pretty busy with her work.”, he said casually. He could see Bucky’s eyes show sadness visibly.

“ Sorry. So you work in intelligence you said?”, Bucky asked.

“ Yeah.”, he is not sure where Bucky is going with all this.

“ Wanna work with us? We have a spot open.”, Steve asked and Daniel sputtered his drink.

“ Sorry, I am such a mess.”, he coughed and wiped his mouth with his napkin. He could feel their eyes on him, waiting for the response. This isn’t going the way he wanted at all.

“ It’s a good pay. And you can work from New York. We work in teams now to avoid the clash.”, Steve chuckled. After Tony and Steve broke each other’s bones in the fight in Siberia, they decided to divide their floors according to the teams. Steve, Tony and Vision lead them.

“ I will think about it, sounds pretty good.”, he focused on his food after that, avoiding anymore discussions that would put his cover in danger.

At some point during dinner when they all got comfortable, Daniel thought what would happen if he told them the truth, right here. Tell them that they have a son. Would they hug him? Would they cry? But telling them will include why he was here. And no matter how much he would explain, they wouldn’t understand. After all, Bucky did everything under Hydra’s control but the moment he was free, he did the right thing. He joined Shield and fought for justice. What would he say about himself? Why did he kill so many people? Not people, monsters. He killed monsters.

So he remained silent, listening to their voices and saving this image of them, as long as it lasts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have zero knowledge about Russian food and the only Russian friend I have lives a continent away.... sorry.
> 
> Find me on tumblr at :  
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/distantyell1


	4. There is a new monster in town

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI GUYS ! sorry for being gone. Here is a new chapter, I hope you guys like it.
> 
> The amazing flyingmax has translated this story to Chinese, for which I am thankful. You can take a look here :  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/20324824/chapters/48188371

Mrs. Jenkins was so delighted to see him, that he almost reveled in the illusion that she actually is his grandmother. She made brownies for him. He ate the entire batch, while getting scolded about his lack of communication.

“ I thought you got into your old habits again. What happened to those boomer phones of yours?”, Daniel chuckled.

“ It’s called burner phones Grandma. And I ran out of money you know. I had to work odd jobs to get by.”, he said, putting another brownie in his mouth. She smiled, obviously happy to see him healthy. She then sat down with him on the couch.

“ What did you do in these four years honey?”, she tried again. He put the brownie back into the plate and sighed.

“ I tried to right some wrongs. Turned out its lot bigger than I thought.”, he said.

“ You tried, that’s enough. Most people don’t even do that. And I am sure all of it didn’t go to waste right.”, she smiled at him.

No, it didn’t. I found my parents. I know my history now. Oh God, he is even older than Mrs. Jenkins.

“ I..I have a job offer. My parents, they want me to work with them for a while.”, he said hesitatingly.

“ You never talk about your parents.”, she was looking at him with surprise.

“ I kind of ran into them during one of those jobs.”, he said, trying to be convincing. Technically, he isn’t lying.

“ That’s great Daniel. They would love to have you with them after such a long time.”, she squeezed his shoulder in support.

“ You think so?”, he looked at her with a small smile.

“ I know so. They are lucky to have a boy like you.”, and she hugged him. In his heart, he wanted to hear these lines, before doing something really stupid.

Like taking a job at Shield.

* * *

The elevator lady was sassy. He is surprised that his first thought in the Avengers compound is regarding an AI.

He mailed his fake documents to New York HQ, hoping to be thorough enough to pass as original ones. He had to do a lot of work but he got through their files, became prepared, embellished his fake resume and then within two weeks, he got the call.

All of this, just so he can be close to his fathers. He doesn’t even know if he is working with them or under them. But if he could see them every day, then that’s not bad right. For him, that’s more than enough.

He entered the security room on the fifth floor. The elevator lady asked him to give his fingerprints and retina scan. He has given them a fake story about Siberia undercover mission. That Shield erased his fingerprints and retina from the database, so that if he is captured and they would try to cross reference him, his identity wont be compromised. Obviously, he wasn’t in Shield database two weeks ago, so he is a little nervous about the screening. He saw a lady with blond hair and approached her.

“ Excuse me, I am here to get my ID for the tower. It’s my first day.”, he said with a smile. The lady scrutinized him head to toe and then pointed towards the main office inside. He thanked her and went in.

“ Agent Ferrero, here for security screening.”, he said in such an usual tone that he even surprised himself for a moment. All of this is so familiar for him, minus these people being hardhearted like Hydra.

“ Why?”, the man sitting on the main communication frame answered. He was looking at a bunch of screens while sipping his coffee. The raven haired man had a scowl on his face.

“ I am new, starting in Captain’s team today.”, he answered not sure if that’s the why he was referring to.

“ Really? I tried wholeheartedly for that job from past three months and you are the one who gets hired.”, he swirled in his chair and fixed him with a look. Great, Daniel doesn’t need this right now. He is preparing really hard to be presentable to his parents. This long haired idiot is making things difficult.

“ Hurry up please, it’s my first day and I don’t want my first impression to be of a late comer.”, he said, fidgeting with his hands. The guy started the process begrudgingly and guided him to the retina scan. After his fingerprints were taken, he started feeding information on a separate computer.

“ So, who did you kill?”, he suddenly asked and Daniel almost made a run through the building’s glass window. Is he busted already? Did the guy looked into his file and found out it was fake? Or maybe he underestimated Shield too much and they investigated him in advance. But the guy was only looking at the computer. He relaxed a little.

“ I don’t understand.”, he said.

“ Oh c’mon darling. The main reason, this position is empty is because Cap needed someone who can work in intelligence, but also in the field if need arises. You obviously impressed him with your kill count or something. He is a man of war.”, the guy was now staring at the printer, which was printing his new ID.

“ No such thing. I was chosen by Mr. Barnes. I was undercover, we met in Siberia.”, the guy was now staring at his ID, as if the picture will give him some sort of glimpse into his past. He gave it in his hands and then looked at him with full attention for the first time. His eyes were green. He was.... beautiful.

Whoa !!! Where did that come from? Get it together Daniel.

“ I like Barnes. But I am the only one who can call him that. You want to make a good impression? Call him Bucky.”, he said and then went back to his chair, signalling that he is finished with him already.

* * *

He moved to the other hallway on fifth floor, which was their training area. He went inside and met with a sight of people, busy with bunch of stuff. But his eyes were looking for Cap and Bucky.

“ Daniel, over here.”, he saw Bucky at waving him from a small shooting range. He had a smile on his face. Daniel walked to him, heart beating fast.

“ Hey, hope I didn’t interrupt training.”, he asked while shaking Bucky’s hand.

“ No, you got your ID?”, he asked.

“ Yeah, the guy in security is something though.”, he smirked.

“ Ah, so you met Loki. You didn’t recognise him?”, Bucky’s eyebrows were furrowed.

Shit. Of course, Loki, God of mischief. The one who killed people during his attack on New York with an alien army. Thor’s brother, fallen prince of Asgard. How did he not recognise him?

“ I mean, this is the last place one would expect to find him.”, nice save. Isn’t he a war criminal? What was he even doing in security?

“ Well, his father wanted him to repent for his crimes. Thanks to some sort of bracelet that blocks his magic, he is here being...useful.”, Bucky explained.

“ So, you are going to work specifically with me. Let me show you where.”, Bucky moved out of the gym and he followed, giddy that he will work with his father. He took him to another room, one like Loki’s but bigger. He saw different high tech systems and virtual screens, an arsenal behind a glass case and few chairs. There was a table but looked like it was only used for meetings.

“ Now let me warn you, the guy before you quit because he couldn’t keep up with us. And also because he was scared of me so.”, Bucky trailed off, while telling him how to use his ID for accessing computers.

“ That won’t be a problem.”, he said, listening intently.

“ You sure you are not scared of me?”, Bucky grinned at him.

“ Quite opposite actually. Can’t wait to work with you.”, he was already waving his hands on the holograms.

“ Good. Now, you are familiar with Siberia right. That’s what we are working on right now. If we can somehow find out their next target, then maybe we can set up a trap.”, Daniel gulped. Great, his father has assigned him an investigation of himself. That isn’t what he expected on his first day.

“ And we are sure that it’s a team?”, Daniel asked. He thought they knew it was a one man job after the slip up he had with Yelena.

“ I am sure that it’s a team. The others think that it’s an operation carried out by one man. What do you think?”, Bucky was suddenly looking at him.

“ I think it’s impossible to execute something at this level alone. Maybe on field its only one guy and has a bunch of people working for him far away, as eyes and ears?”, Daniel offered. He has a chance to throw this investigation off him. Bucky looked thoughtful for a moment.

“ Even if I believe what you said, do you know the level of training and efficiency that is required to destroy 68 hydra hideouts? That too without leaving a single evidence?”, Bucky raised his eyebrows. Daniel sighed.

“ I am with you on the team thing. It’s just that all the reports here say it’s just one man.”, Daniel said while scrolling on the screen, which had all the investigation reports. He then noticed Bucky’s worried expression.

“ Is there something else?”, he asked softly. Bucky looked up, he chewed his lip as if deciding how to proceed.

“ If whatever these reports say are true, don’t you think it’s an even bigger threat ?”, Bucky said.

“ Bigger threat? The guy is practically doing a noble job by wiping Hydra off this planet.”, Daniel said, he worked real hard for that. How is that a bigger threat? He achieved what Shield couldn’t in such a long time. He saved innocents, killed the merciless Hydra agents. Shouldn’t Bucky be happy about that?

“ You sound exactly like Natasha now. She is really happy that someone hates Hydra with such passion. Even I am relieved, but if there is someone this powerful and capable in this world, who can destroy a ruthless organisation alone, God knows what else he can do. What if Shield is on his radar next? How do you kill so many people alone and carry burden of their deaths with so much ease? I know they don’t deserve mercy, but doing something like this and then sleeping at night? This guy is no less monster than Hydra is.”, Bucky said, a look of disgust on his face.

Daniel felt like all the air escaped the room and left him suffocated. It was hard to breath. The euphoria of being with his parents shattered in a second. All that he did in past four years in vain, because his father hates him.

_His father thinks he is a monster._

“ Maybe...he had no choice.”, Daniel said, his voice small and unsure.

He didn’t. Who would’ve helped him? One word from him and he would’ve been locked up because of his past crimes. Not everyone gets to be fortunate like Bucky and Natasha. He knows he is dangerous. He is too precise in his killings and invasions, too thorough. But killing those men, who terrorised innocent people for years made him sleep even better at night. It made him feel safe. He knows they wouldn’t follow him, because he killed them. He doesn’t know protocols of human emotion that well. There was no one around who would’ve told him the effects and side effects of what he was doing.

And by the time he realised the toll it took on his heart and soul, it was too late.

“ Maybe. I will leave you to catch up on the previous reports. Lets meet tomorrow at 9.”, Bucky smiled at him and left, leaving Daniel alone in that vast office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Find me on tumblr @
> 
> https://www.tumblr.com/blog/distantyell1


	5. Alien problems

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAY!!!! I am back.

Daniel was controlling his strength so that he wouldn’t break the punching bag on the gym of their floor. After their conversation in the office, Daniel decided to just make best of the situation. He always knew that he wouldn’t be able to tell them the truth about him. Then why did it hurt so much. For a moment, he thought of running away. But then, he saw Bucky working hard every day, still trying to make amends for his past mistakes and thought, maybe this is how he should repent his crimes. So, he joined him with full dedication, sitting behind the holograms for hours and looking for further Hydra evidence. There are so many people still suffering under its clutches and maybe Daniel can help them. They have busted four new places in last three months. Daniel didn’t go into the field obviously, sitting behind the monitors and guiding them ahead. When they would return, his parents would be disappointed. Their main objective was to find the supposed man who was destroying them before. Daniel knows it’s only a matter of time for them to get suspicious that the raids have suddenly stopped. There is no way they could trace it back to him, but every time they would have a meeting, Daniel would feel a slight dread in his heart. This was becoming very complicated.

He was punching without a break, thoughts creating a whirlwind in his head.

“ Did that punching bag cheat on you or something?”, the voice boomed and Daniel missed his punch, looking around to find the source. What he didn’t expect was a guy hanging from the ceiling, waving at him.

“ Hi, I am Peter Parker.”, the guy was still stuck to ceiling and Daniel thought maybe he should help him get down or something.

“ Do you need some help?”, Daniel asked in doubt. The guy didn’t look much worried about being stuck.

“ Yes, but not in the department you’re thinking.”, Steve came into the gym.

“ Queens, you are banned from the ceilings for two weeks.”, the guy landed on the ground with so much ease that even Daniel got a little impressed. His smile vanished as he stood in front of Steve.

“ What? You can’t do that. I was just hanging out. Get it?”, Peter grinned and made his puppy eyes on him. But unlike others, Steve was immune to them.

“ Three weeks.”, Steve deadpanned and Peter’s smile vanished. He turned to Daniel and started talking.

“ So, we haven’t met properly. I am Peter, essential and only young member of team Iron man, your go to guide for any pop culture reference that needs explaining.”, Steve rolled his eyes at that. Daniel was slightly wonder struck at the sheer enthusiasm displayed by Peter.

“ I am Daniel.”, he shook his hand and Peter gave him a real big grin for no reason.

“ I wish you were working in my team, where everyone is either old or a robot.”, Peter sighed. Daniel couldn’t help but smile. He saw Loki coming in with a file and straightened up. Bucky was also with him. He couldn’t help but feel a little apprehensive.

You see, Loki is a very observant guy. He is a trickster, and has a habit of cataloguing any kind of weakness presented by his targets. Daniel is pretty sure he is one. Loki always gives him an indecipherable look, as if trying to figure out something about him.

“ Spiderling, give us a minute. I am pretty sure Captain needs you for spotting anyway.”, Loki said and Peter scurried away from the group.

“ You are going to D.C. with Loki.”, Bucky said to Daniel and his heart started beating loudly. They never sent him outside on a mission.

“ D.C., why?”, he looked at them with his eyes narrowed.

“ There is a problem in data systems of the new Shield HQ. They need someone vey skilled like me to help them.”, Loki said looking very pleased with himself. Daniel didn’t like the way he was smirking at him. Of course the data system isn’t working. Daniel made sure to hack it so that they couldn’t access the files of undercover agents, or his secret will be blown. He couldn’t help but think it’s an elaborate plan to get the truth out of him.

“ Okay , but why me. You can obviously handle yourself well.”, Daniel replied.

“ Well, I said the same thing but then Loki suggested that you worked in DC and having a familiar face will work in his favour.”, Daniel gulped and looked at Loki. This is a trap. Loki is definitely onto something and it won’t be good for him. He wrote that he worked in D.C. prior to Siberia. He has to think of something, really fast.

* * *

“ I wish I had my magic. Teleportation is way better than flying in this metal contraption.”, Loki grumbled, adjusting his seat belt on the quinjet.

“ It’s barely an hour.”, Daniel rolled his eyes. Are all Gods this whiny? Daniel has met Thor and he is a sweet heart, a big, blond, happy puppy who smiles at everything new. But here he is, stuck with the annoying raven haired douche bag, who has pointed at least fifty things that are wrong with this plane within past fifteen minutes. He has ten contingency plans in his head if something goes wrong. But that will come later, if he survives this flight with Loki.

“ These belts are of defective design. They barely get the job done. They are nothing but a frivolous piece of junk.”, Daniel huffed and looked at him.

“ Then don’t use it, God.”, he closed his eyes, feeling a headache coming. The constant worry and Loki’s nonstop commentary is too much.

“ I am not that arrogant. Speaking of which, why haven’t you done yours?”, Loki looked at his undone seat belt.

This is the one thing he can’t get over of. He isn’t claustrophobic anymore. He is okay with being in close spaces now. He has no fear of needles, which surprised him since the number of times he was injected with various chemicals was huge. Airplanes belts are okay too. You won’t even feel they are there. But this is the quinjet. The safety belts are in a Y and bind the body to the back rest. And it makes him restless. The binds remind him of the time at the facility. Every time he was sent back in cryo, he would resist. Waking up was good, it was the only thing close to happiness he remembered. But when the mission was over, he would try to be awake a little more. He had thoughts, curiosities, a drive no matter how small. He would try to remember about anything else but this facility and lab coats. But the memory wipes were necessary. They couldn’t afford to explain all his previous missions to him. So they would bind him to the chair, force him to calm down and take away those fleeting memories again.

Which is why, he didn’t put the belt on. He won’t be able to breathe if he did. He can’t risk showing his weak points to Loki, who is already after him.

“ I will, in a minute.”, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes, trying to take his mind away from those thoughts.

“ You don’t look so good. Is there something bothering you Agent Ferrero?”, his tone was over innocent and Daniel lost it.

“ You! You are bothering me. I am begging you to shut up before I jump out of this plane. Or worse, throw you out of it.”, Daniel glared at him and Loki smirked, again.

“ Why do you think that’d be worse? I might enjoy it.”, Daniel sighed and flopped down in his seat.

“ Go to sleep Agent Ferrero.”, Loki said and Daniel doesn’t remember when everything went black.

* * *

He woke up with a jolt, very confused by his surroundings. He saw Loki standing near his seat, looking at him with curious eyes. He sat up in a hurry and opened the belt done over his chest.

“ Wow, you slept through a lot of turbulence. Not a very flattering quality for a Shield agent.”, Loki said and went out of the jet. They’ve landed on the roof of D.C. headquarters. Daniel doesn’t remember falling asleep. He followed Loki and entered the communications department, which looked almost the same as New York. Loki gave a look to the systems and started talking to other people. Daniel felt very out of place. It was strange when Loki kept working on the problem and didn’t involve him, or asked anyone about him. Didn’t he want to expose him? All the anticipation made him uneasy.

He still took pleasure in Loki’s frustration, which was the result of his tinkering with D.C. database. The virus he had uploaded in their systems will take a vast amount of time to cleanse. And as far as he knows, Loki is not a very patient man.

“ You are telling me that none of you know where it came from?”, Loki asked, his head in his hands. Daniel smirked at his exasperation.

“ Where? We didn’t even know something like this was possible. The person who did this, is smarter than Shield combined.”, one of the guys spoke. Loki gave them a glare and then resumed working.

“ Leave us alone. I will call you when it’s done.”, Loki said after a while. Daniel almost had mercy on him but didn’t help. He was enjoying it too much.

“ I thought you were very skilled for this.”, Daniel taunted. Loki smiled a little.

“ I am glad you pay attention to me.”, he said and even though Daniel meant it to be a jab, he didn’t like the reaction he got.

“ Looks like it will take a lot of time. If you want to catch up with your old companions, I won’t mind.”, Loki insisted. Daniel knew Loki is trying to be subtle, not calling him out directly.

“ I’ll pass. Half of my friends are transferred anyway.”, he played in return. If Loki was disappointed at his failed attempt, he didn’t show. He nodded and resumed his work. After an hour, two words came out of his mouth, which Daniel never expected to hear from an Asgardian prince.

“ Fuck it.”, and he slapped the table so hard, all the computers and screens rattled. However, that wasn’t the most shocking part, it was how the screens started clearing up and within seconds the database was online again.

“ Oh, these midgardian contrivances are amusing.”, Daniel rushed to his side and looked at his genius virus crumbling down the drain. He looked at Loki and then back at the computer.

“ Looks like our work is done here.”, Loki stood up and left. Daniel had no choice but to follow. What the hell does he want from him?

* * *

Loki relieved the pilot of quinjet, saying they won’t be going to new York directly. When Daniel asked where, he didn’t say anything. Loki set the plane on autopilot and then sat in front of him.

“ Why was your name missing from the database?”, Daniel looked in his eyes. Loki isn’t tiptoeing anymore.“ I was undercover. My details are expunged.”, he said, without hesitation. Confidence is the key in this situation.

“ Your cover is blown. You should be reinstated in the records by now. Why do you think I waited for three months?”, Daniel bit his lower lip. This guy is good.

“ Maybe I am still undercover.”, Daniel said, bringing one of the contingency plans in action. Loki smiled and looked down.

“ Lying to the God of lies, when will you mortals learn.”, Loki stood up, folding his hands on his chest.

“ You have thirty seconds to give me a clear answer.”, Daniel looked at him, the body language has changed. This isn’t the Loki who works with him in the avengers tower.

“ I am working undercover for Shield. I have been assigned to keep an eye on the Winter soldier. I request you to keep it between us.”, Daniel said and Loki raised his eyebrows.

“ Really? Why now? Why after four years? Barnes isn’t the Winter soldier anymore.”, Daniel could see the possessiveness Loki has for his father. He feels bad for using his Dad like this, but he has no choice.

“ I don’t question my orders, I follow them.”, Daniel stood up, maintaining the calm face effortlessly. Loki looked at him, as if waiting for his confession.

“ Your thirty seconds are up Agent Ferrero. You can explain to Captain Rogers why you have his fiancé under surveillance.”, Loki started to leave.

“ Oh sure, go ahead. You see, I am working for shield and even if you tell him, I will land somewhere else for another job. But what would happen when your ‘holier than thou’ Captain gets to know that you still have your magic?”, Loki stopped and looked at him in shock.

“ I don’t know what you are talking about.”, Loki said and Daniel chuckled.

“ And I don’t know how you found a loophole in that magic bracelet of yours. You put me to sleep on the quinjet, put my seatbelt on. And then after your manual ways didn’t work, you used your magic and restored the computers again. Tell me Loki, what would happen if Steve knows about this? You don’t have that many strikes left. He still doesn’t trust you. One little slip and you will be back on Asgard. Isn’t that the deal you made with your father?”, Daniel came closer to Loki, only inches apart. Loki was enraged, clenching his teeth and eyes full of fury.

“ That’s right. You are not the only one who did his research.”, Loki held him by his collar and growled. Daniel could feel his breath on his chin, but he didn’t budge.

“ If you do anything to Barnes, I won’t care about the consequences.”, Loki spat out. Daniel was impressed by the sheer amount of change in his character.

“ You have to believe me when I say that I would never hurt him, even if Shield demands it. But you have to stay out of my way. I won’t say anything if you won’t. I know you don’t want to go back. Why else would you be here on a barely advanced planet, repairing computers for a living.”, Daniel finished softly. Loki released his hold on him, setting his collar back in place.

“ You don’t know anything about me. You keep an eye on Barnes, but I have my eyes on you. Just remember, I won’t hesitate to kill you, even if I have to spent rest of my life in a cell on Asgard.”, he walked away and sat on the pilot seat. Daniel took a breath of relief. The crisis is averted, but he has to be careful from now on. Loki is very protective of his Dad, something he didn’t know. Sure he saw them talking together, and noticed that Bucky is the only person Loki actually laughs with. But he didn’t know Loki genuinely cares for him, until now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was it? Do tell me peeps. I have missed you guys so much :)


	6. Broken promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go again!!!!   
> Sorry for the delay ...again.

Bucky was sprawled on the bed, sleeping with his mouth open. That’s how Steve found him, when returned from a three day long mission. He quickly changed his clothes, wearing only sweatpants, rest of his body naked and slipped inside the duvet. Bucky turned to his side on instinct and Steve smiled. There was a time when Bucky would’ve pulled out a knife at this kind of sudden intrusion. But now, they are engaged, together like they could never be in the 40s. Now that Bucky is with him, he loves his life again. When he came out of the ice, his life was limited, a routine that he’d been following just because he has a brain who would remind him that living is important. He threw himself into work, tried to adjust in this ultra modern era than he was born in, met Peggy and really smiled for the first time since he woke up. He met Tony and made a friend, but then moved to DC because New York wasn’t his anymore. He missed Brooklyn, missed the memories trapped in that small rented room they used to live in.

He still remembers the day. It was raining. Bucky was missing and for the first time in his life, he understood that Bucky isn’t a friend anymore. He felt like someone dug their nails deep in the delicate flesh of his heart. It felt wrong back then, to feel like this for his best friend. But it didn’t stop Steve telling Bucky that he loved him. Losing Bucky once was enough of a reminder. Bucky cried that night on his shoulder, telling him how much he had wanted to hear it. They kissed for the first time in that dingy army camp, starved for each other. They decided to be together forever that night. Peggy was the first one to figure out. She never told anyone, even asked Steve to move on, live his life. Steve tried to nod along her request but he couldn’t. Peggy knew why.

When that black muzzle ripped away, Steve was in shock. He couldn’t believe his eyes, because there was Bucky, alive in front of him, adamant on killing him with his extremely sharp knife. He shot Natasha and Steve didn’t even bother to ask her if she’s okay. He was too foggy to be relevant in that moment, images flashing in front of his eyes, of a taller boy trying to drag him away by his collar from a fight. He would’ve passed out if Sam wasn’t there.

Sam became his shoulder to lean on in that moment when he was second guessing everything. He was a voice of reason, a skillful commander and a good friend. He abandoned his usual life and stood by Steve’s side. He embraced Bucky when he was too unsure of his surroundings at Avengers tower. He taught him Mario kart, took it on himself to make sure Bucky was alright. He slept on the couch when Steve went on missions, because Bucky was too paranoid to sleep alone. It was a long road to recovery and he was lucky to have Sam by his side.

He felt very unlucky, when Sam called him at five in the morning.

“ Cap, we have a situation. You and Bucky need to come in.”, his voice didn’t sound very urgent and Steve groaned.

“ You know what, stop calling us at ass o clock in the morning.”, Steve sat up, waking Bucky in the process.

“ Woah, language old man. Also, it’s not my fault. Your new shiny recruit didn’t sleep all night, because and I quote, “ This shit is seriously important Sammy.’”. So blame him.”, Bucky sobered up when he overheard. It must be important.

* * *

When Steve and Bucky entered their lab, Daniel was still sitting in front of numerous holograms open. He was in a heated discussion with Sam and Nat. Steve quickly interrupted the conversation.

“ What’s going on?”, Steve asked, voice louder than usual. Bucky was focusing on the holograms instead.

“ Danny boy thinks Strucker’s still alive.”, Sam said, gaze darting towards Daniel, who despite being awake all night, didn’t seem exhausted.

“ First of all, I am sure he is alive and second, never ever call me that again.”, he grumbled, hitting the keys on his computer. Sam was vaguely pleased at that reaction.

“ I killed him myself Daniel.”, Steve’s voice was low. He could see how important this is to Daniel for some reason. But he didn’t want to give him false hope. Daniel raised his eyebrows but then turned to the computer again, bringing up a series of coded messages. Bucky looked closely at the mismatched numbers and alphabet.

“ Shit.”, Nat whispered, aggressively accessing the computer side by side.

“ What does it mean?”, Steve and Sam felt frustrated.

“ It says Strucker is on the move.”, Nat said, still plastered near the screen. She asked Daniel to do something, who acted instantly. Seconds later, they were seeing a few screen caps of conversations.

“ What’re we looking at?”, Sam narrowed his eyes at the display.

“ Two parties are talking about moving something. It’s either a weapon or Strucker himself. We can’t be sure.”, Nat said the last part glaring at Daniel.

“ Yes, we can. You and Bucky are aware what Hydra did after the helicarriers went down.”, he didn’t want to say it but they weren’t taking him seriously. Bucky and Nat looked at each other in hurry.

“ Okay, speak up.”, Steve was clearly unhappy with the incomplete information.

“ Loki’s sceptre wasn’t the only thing Strucker needed. They stole so many other things, including the face morph tech that I used. It’s possible..that the Strucker you killed wasn’t the real one. The three of us discussed the possibility few days ago.”, Nat said, chewing on her bottom lip.

“ And exactly when you were planning to tell us?”, Steve narrowed his eyes.

“ We weren’t sure.”, Bucky said after being silent in the whole conversation.

“ We thought it was a possibility. Strucker was one of big ones in Hydra. He was a general. It shouldn’t have been that easy. C’mon Steve, tell me you didn’t think the same?”, Bucky looked at Steve whose anger was faltering now.

“ But now we have proof. We have three possible locations where we could find him. It would be a big success if we could get our hands on someone like him. We can finally destroy Hydra at its weakest.”, Daniel said, a fire in his eyes, which confused everyone around. But no one said anything about that. The room was silent for a while.

“ Narrow down the location to one. The other two teams are away on separate missions so we need a solid target. If he is alive, our main focus is to take prisoners. Bucky and Daniel will stay and guide us.”, Daniel stood up at that.

“ But I can help. I can..”, Bucky suddenly pulled him down on his seat.

“ He means we will be here with the target. Suit up.”, it was Steve’s line but Bucky said it this time to hurry the crowd out. Daniel was again buried in the computers.

“ Thanks for ratting me out kid.”, he said and Daniel closed his eyes, remembering how he slipped and told Steve about their conversation.

“ I am sorry, but it was important.”, Bucky wasn’t listening though. He stood up and left. Daniel wanted to bang his head on the table. But like Bucky said, Strucker was in the big league. They can solve so much, if they capture him. He somehow managed to upset both his Dads at the same time, brilliant.

He saw Bucky coming back, two cups of coffee in his hands. He sat down next to him and gave him one. He looked at him, suddenly confused.

“ You are not mad.”, Daniel’s voice lowered. Bucky smirked at him.

“ Like you said, it was important. Drink your coffee, we have a lot of shit to do and it’s too fucking early”, and they both started on the information in front of them.

* * *

“ How did you get access to these servers?”, Bucky asked. He looked at the impressive ways Daniel used, to find the location they are to attack. It filled him with strange pride that choosing Daniel wasn’t wrong.

“ Loki helped, I asked him to work with me on this.”, Bucky narrowed his eyes. It’s not easy to convince Loki to help.

“ Wow! So you two are friends now?”, Bucky teased. Daniel thought about their encounter on the quinjet and shuddered.

“ Oh yeah, after few death threats and destroying my jacket collar for good, we became friends.”, Bucky laughed at that.

“ Sounds like Loki, you ready Danny boy?”, Bucky asked when he saw the team coming in, this time fully dressed.

“ Not you too.”, he groaned but then started explaining the layout of the building. It was a small pharmaceutical lab, located away from the city. So they weren’t worried about civilian casualties. They had learnt their lesson after Sokovia, trying to be much more careful. They were keeping an eye on them from the base, when Bucky started talking, calling him Danny more and more as conversation went.

“ Will you stop with that now?”, Daniel said, a slight playful tone hidden in his voice. It was a nice feeling, to be like this with his Dad.

“ Why? What’s wrong with Danny? It’s cute.”, Bucky didn’t move his eyes from the screen, but his smile was still visible from the side.

Daniel thought about it then. What is wrong with it? Nothing, it’s just new. He didn’t have a name before now he has two.

“ No one ever gave me a nickname before.”, he said, as if realising it himself the first time. Bucky looked at him carrying a sombre look on his face. He cursed himself mentally, remembering that his parents are dead. He didn’t know when, but judging from Daniel’s face, it was before they could even give him an adorable kiddie title to embarrass him forever in future.

“ Sorry. I will stop.”, Bucky looked at the blinking dot that was Steve. A rush of fear came and went through him, thinking about losing Steve, like Daniel lost his parents. He took a deep breath and spoke in the head set.

“ Are you in position?”, Bucky asked. The affirmative came and like they suspected the building was empty in the morning. They were going to wait and attack when they arrive.

“ Steve?”, Bucky said, doubt lingering in his thoughts. Steve waited for the command patiently.

“ Be safe.”, Bucky whispered. They have been through this so many times, yet it feels equally difficult. Steve understood the emotion and smiled.

“ I will.”, and they went inside.

* * *

It was horrible. When the fight started, the cavalry was much more than expected. They were filling in the building like roaches. Steve took some of the fight outside, trying to give the others some room. The Shield agents were fighting with all they got, but there were too many of them. Natasha flawlessly created a massacre after her, Sam was hovering over Steve, trying to take out the snipers. There were freaking snipers at every roof, as if they knew about their arrival. They surely didn’t trip any sensors.

Bucky’s heart was thudding like crazy. He could hear Steve, grunting and yelling through his earpiece. Loki was standing behind them, fingers tapping on his thigh in anticipation. Daniel sat with rage in his eyes. No matter how many he killed, Hydra will always be busy in creating new heads. They were ready this time. They were being more careful.

And here Daniel thought it was going to be over soon.

Loki and Bucky exchanged a look and Bucky nodded. He quickly spoke in his speaker.

“ Fall back.”, he controlled himself not to raise his voice and destroy Steve’s eardrums in the process. He heard the clang of the shield and Steve’s tired voice.

“ Buck?” it was a question this time, his name. Bucky said the same words again and heard Steve calling the command to his troop. But then, they heard a scream, and after few vague screeches, the audio stopped. Bucky stood up in alarm.

“Steve? Steve?”, he tried to keep himself calm, but his face was failing the task.

“ They need back up.”, Loki said in an eerie tone, while trying to get the communication back up. Suddenly, Daniel wanted to punch him. Bucky was opening the locks and getting out his gun, ready to barge in on the situation.

“ Wait, I’ll go.”, Daniel stood in front of him.

“ You don’t know Hydra like I do. Get out of my way.”, the previous lightness of Bucky’s voice had gone. It was replaced by a rough strained version of it.

If only Bucky knew how much he knew Hydra. It was his fault. He should’ve done more, much more than the information he gave to the team. And now, his parents are going to suffer because he wasn’t thorough. He didn’t move, still blocking the exit.

“ Listen to me, as soon as comms are back up, Cap will need an exit for his team. You are the only who can do that.”, Daniel tried to reason with him but it didn’t work. When Bucky didn’t stop, Daniel followed him. They got in the quinjet. Daniel made his presence known when they were in the air. He couldn’t risk being left behind.

When Bucky noticed, he lost it.

“ What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”, Daniel understood that the anger was misdirected. Hydra took a lot from him and now Steve was enclosed in building full of Hydra agents. Daniel didn’t waste time, getting the building layout on his phone. Bucky can yell at him if he wants.

“ They are still at the front. Cap was outside the gate when the comms went down.”, he could see the visible change in his demeanour, when Daniel took Steve’s name.

“ If we can get in the back, and cause a diversion, we can easily get everyone out.”, Bucky narrowed his eyes at him. It was difficult to see how much his Dad changed without Steve. It was scaring him a little. But Bucky held back, took a deep breath and then started planning.

“ We can go in the back and try to infiltrate from the inside.”, Daniel said. Bucky was about to argue, but then closed his lips. They divided the thirty agents they had, into two teams.

“ Let’s hope it works.”, Bucky tried to smile at him, the guilt of his actions clear on his face. Daniel wanted to say that it’s okay. That he was in the wrong. But he didn’t. He had acted unprofessionally enough. From now on, it’s only orders.

* * *

The plan was working. The front side of the gate was now narrowing down to more shield uniforms standing upright. Which meant hydra was losing slowly. Sam was guarding the back exit after comms got back online. Daniel was smooth in his movements, making Bucky a little nervous. They split up inside the building, which was a big maze of rooms and hallways. He could hear the rattling of Bucky’s gun even from afar. He had a knife and a gun tucked in his ankle. Using knife was much more efficient when you are killing people while running. Daniel was very skilled in that.

He lost count of how many he killed, leaving the team of agents behind because he was too damn fast. He reached a room with a strong metal door. He had an idea what was inside and how foolish it would be to go in alone.

But he was so close.

He could feel the door inviting him in, he could kill him easily.

Daniel shook his head and gripped his knife tight. The outside was still a mess of gunfire and smoke, the fight clearly going on. Steve said to arrest him, he thought. Yeah, that’s what he will do. He will follow the orders.

He went in, movements silent like a cat and looked into the room, which was growing a little dark. He found himself at gunpoint, still clutching the knife tightly. Strucker stood in front of him, his ugly glasses had a little crack on it.

“ Found him.”, he said. They would hear him, he knew. Bucky’s voice was booming in his ear. He was telling him to wait fro backup. But that’s not what was worrying him.

It was Strucker’s face, which slightly contorted in recognition. And then, he started laughing. That’s when Daniel realized he knew him.

Strucker knew him.

Daniel sprang into action before he could say anything. He was too fast. Strucker didn’t stand a chance. The gun was in Daniel’s hand now, pointing between his eyes. He got his earpiece out and crushed it in his hands.

He tried. He did his best to take Strucker a prisoner. But he can’t now. He never thought before killing. They were culprits. They were responsible for everything that happened to his family. But Steve told him not to.

“ Look at you, alive and kicking.”, Strucker chuckled. Daniel gripped his gun hard, aiming close to his forehead.

“ So are you.”, Daniel replied, gritting his teeth.

“ You are working without orders now? Then what are you waiting for?”, Daniel’s hand was starting to shake now. He can’t. He cannot disappoint his family again. He swore he won’t be a murderer anymore. He flipped the gun and swung it on his head. Strucker fell down, but quickly snatched the gun from his ankle. They started to struggle, Daniel kicked the gun out of his hands. Strucker stood up fast and punched him square in the jaw. Daniel aimed the gun again but was tackled to the ground. Strucker was choking him in his grip, while he aimed the gun to his head. This was the first time he let his emotions fog up his actions. He hesitated and was paying the price.

“ Shh...I am not going to kill you DNL 44. You are precious for us.”, Daniel struggled to breath, when his hold tightened more.

“ It’s okay, we will wipe you, you won’t remember a thing. And then we will use you to bring the asset in. We can’t lose our winter soldier now, can we?”, Strucker chuckled.

_We can’t lose our winter soldier now, can we._

The words flipped something in him and he roared. He threw his head back with full force, bloodying Strucker’s nose. His hold weakened and Daniel punched him over and over, not giving him any time to recover. At last, he held him by his neck, his back on his chest and a gun to his head again.

“ You. Are. Never. Going to get him again.”, he said, voice vicious. He put the gun in Strucker’s hand, overlapping it with his own and then shot himself in the shoulder. Strucker was frozen now. Daniel didn’t even move, he stood as if nothing happened. As if he didn’t just shoot himself. He took the gun in his control again, turning Strucker to face him.

“ Oh no! Did you just shoot me? I guess it gives me the choice to kill you..in self defense.”, Strucker started shaking at this new development, not gloating anymore.

“ No please.. wait! I can give you information, valuable stuff.”, there was fear in his eyes and Daniel felt relief tingling in his nerve endings.

“ Shh! it’s okay, I am just finishing what my Dad started in Sokovia.”, he shot him thrice, the new revelation shining in Strucker’s eyes, that he is Steve Rogers’ son. Blood bubbled from his mouth and then he stopped moving. Daniel closed his eyes.

One more monster gone.

* * *

It was Steve who entered first, stopping in his tracks to see Strucker’s body on the ground, his face painted with blood and mass of red pooling his chest.

“ Dear God.”, Steve whispered. He quickly scanned the area and saw a body huddled behind the door. He was faced with a gun, when he tried to look.

“ It’s me, it’s Steve.”, Steve raised his hands up in surrender, not to startle Daniel, who was leaning on the wall. His left shoulder dripping blood due to the gunshot wound, gaping shamelessly. He lowered the gun with a thud on the ground, finally closing his eyes.

“ No, hey, stay awake alright.”, Steve quickly called help on his comms, holding him by his right shoulder. He wanted to say he was okay. He had endured worse. He’d jumped from the building tops, had been shot numerous times, and had been shot and stabbed together numerous times. It never kills him. It wouldn’t. The blood loss will be evened by a good sleep at night. That’s how easy it was, the healing. But he can’t let them know that. It wouldn’t be the right time. He isn’t sure if there ever be a right time, now that he has killed again. He couldn’t keep a single promise that he did to himself. That he would repent his crimes. This isn’t reparation. He would never be more than the thing Hydra made him.

Last thing he saw was Bucky’s worried face, before the darkness took him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lemme know if you liked it. Happy holidays people :)


	7. Liars, and other liars

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How was christmas guys? hope everyone is enjoying the holidays.  
> Here is another one.

Nightmares plagued his twitchy sleep. He saw terrible things. He saw Steve locking him behind the bars because he was a murderer. He saw Bucky telling him that he had taken someone’s life. He saw them looking into his eyes and saying,

“ You are not our son. He can’t be a murderer.”, they said together, walking away and leaving him behind. Suddenly, he was back in that glass tube again, trying to breathe while lab coats gathered around.

“ Don’t leave me..Dad please.”, he whispered in his dream, not knowing that he was murmuring the words in reality.

Bucky looked at Daniel when he whimpered. He dragged his chair close and tried to hear. When he heard the words, they felt personal. Bucky suddenly felt uneasy, not sure what to do. A few seconds later, Daniel opened his eyes and gasped, sitting up in hurry.

“ Hey, lay down.”, Bucky tried to coerce him into lying down but Daniel threw his hands away in confusion.

“ Easy Daniel. You are okay.”, Bucky said softly. Daniel followed the voice and then looked at him.

“ You are here.”, Daniel seemed confused, because mere seconds ago, he was leaving him again. He tried to catch his breath and then looked up again.

“ Of course I am. I have no interest in what conspires after the mission, so here it is.”, Daniel nodded and they settled in silence. He felt odd because Bucky wasn’t asking any question at all. Bucky on the other hand was still thinking about what he said in his sleep.

_Don’t leave me...Dad please._

Something terrible happened to him, Bucky is sure. But the way Daniel was eager to capture Strucker was different. In fact, anything related to Hydra lit his eyes. He tried to access his file, but the only thing written in it about his parents was MIA. Was it because of Hydra? Bucky knows why he is doing it. He has enough crimes on his shoulders, even thought Steve keeps telling him it’s not his fault, he needs to do it. For his conscience, for his peace, he tries to do as much as he can.

But what is it that gets Daniel so motivated? Is it his family? He saw him today on the field. He was flawless, moving with such ease around so much death. He never saw any Shield officer move like that before. Bucky couldn’t help but doubt him for a bit. After all, they don’t know him well. He doesn’t talk about D.C. much. Peter is his only friend outside the team. He doesn’t have good social skills. He never talks about his life before, doesn’t even mention his Grandma much. His M.O. is very different than other Shield agents. He was a bit.. more. As if he had so much practice. He has never worked in field before then how? Daniel noticed his dilemma.

“ What’s wrong?”, he asked. He could feel the wound on his shoulder closing rapidly. He has to keep the bandage on for few days though. Bucky took a deep breath before starting.

“ The way you work, how involved you are with it, it all seems so personal.”, Bucky said, doubt lingering in his eyes. Daniel sat up straight and replied.

“ We work for Shield. That’s what we do.”, Daniel was crafting his words carefully. Bucky didn’t look very satisfied with his answer.

“ You need to tell me if there is another motive. Sooner or later, you will be reckless and it would be compromising for the team. Tell me before I dissolve your position and let you go.”, there wasn’t anger in his voice but he couldn’t help but feel betrayed. He saw how Daniel gripped the sheets, veins visible on his hands. He knows this tell. He does the same when he has to gather courage for an act. He waited patiently.

“ They took my parents.”, he said, looking at him with glassy eyes. Bucky’s resolve shook a little but he didn’t show it. He signaled him to continue.

“ My parents were in the army. Hydra tortured them, used them. They ripped our family apart.”, Daniel gritted his teeth. Bucky cursed under his breath.

“ Do you know..how long it has been? I was left alone. I always felt I had no one. I had no aim, I was..I had no purpose. I was alive but I wasn’t living.”, Daniel stared blankly in front of him. Bucky was very familiar with the feeling. When he finally broke his conditioning, he had no clue where to go, what to do. It was devastating until Steve found him again. Or he found Steve in a way. He found his hope.

“ You said you have a grandmother.”, Bucky asked.

“ Yeah, I would’ve died without her.”, Daniel smiled a little. It’s not a lie. Grandma did save him.

“ She made me the man I am today.”, coz Hydra took you away, he thought. He didn’t have anyone to groom him, to tell him his mistakes. He didn’t have a fucking past to remember, just a frozen casket of doom. He remembers the training when he should’ve been playing in the park. He remembers blood and dead eyes of his victims, when he should’ve been going to the prom. He should’ve known what _prom_ is. He should’ve been with him, with Steve. A tear escaped his eye. Before Bucky could respond, people entered the infirmary. Bucky quickly nodded and Daniel understood. He wiped his cheek and looked down. A grey haired man in a cheap fitted suit, was standing in front of him. He could see Steve and Natasha behind. It looks like his nightmare was going to come true. Bucky stood up from his chair.

“ Secretary Ross.”, Bucky greeted, without a smile. Now that he noticed, everyone was tense around this man.

“ So, you are the one who shot Strucker.”, he said, clearly unimpressed. Daniel looked at Steve, who nodded.

“ Agent Ferrero Sir.”, he said after a beat.

“ Do you know how important Wolfgang Von Strucker was? You shot him like a simple street thief. Care to explain your actions, Agent Ferrero?”, Ross raised his eyebrows. But Steve answered before Daniel did.

“ With all due respect Sir, we wouldn’t have known that Strucker was even alive. Daniel found him. It was an excellent investigation. Daniel shot him in self defense.”, Steve said. Daniel knew by the face that Ross wasn’t very happy.

“ Consider this your first and last warning. It will be suspension next time or worse.”, Ross left and the room took a collective breath of relief. Steve stood in front of Daniel.

“ You disobeyed a direct order from a superior. What were you thinking?”, Steve was furious. Daniel looked down in his lap.

“ The team was in danger. You needed backup.”, he said slowly.

“ Back up means Barnes and Shield agents, who are trained for the field. not you.”, his voice was the same as before.

“ I do not regret my actions, but I am sorry Captain.”, it was so familiar that Bucky had to stifle his laugh. Steve has finally met his match. He gave Bucky a grave look, so he composed himself.

“ Next time, I won’t defend you in front of Ross. But you did good.”, he left the room after that. Nat sat on bed by his side and slapped his injured shoulder.

“ Ouhhh!! Why?”, he grimaced in pain.

“ Congratulations, you have officially gotten a personal lecture from Captain America. It’s a rite of passage in this team.”, she gave him a coy smile. Bucky sat on his other side.

“ But he is seriously pissed at me.”, he said looking at the door.

“ Steve Rogers has never followed a goddamn rule in his entire life. He will come around.”, Bucky chuckled, but then thinned his lips in thought. Nat understood that something was bothering him.

“ Nat and I have lost so much because of Hydra. I understand what you feel, but this isn’t the way. You are going to combust if you keep all that rage buried inside you. You need to take a break.”, Bucky looked at him.

“ Did someone say break?”, Tony Stark entered the infirmary. He was holding an envelope in his hand.

“ We are saving paper so here’s a teeny tiny invitation card for all of you who live in building A. It’s Morgan’s birthday and we will be happy to have you in our building rather than this one.”, he handed it to Nat who inspected the card.

“ Wow, Morgan’s going to be three.”, Bucky suddenly realised. The three started talking to each other, meeting after a long time despite living at the same place. Tony looked at the other occupant in the room.

“ And who are you?”, Tony asked.

“ Tony, meet agent Daniel Fererro. He is on our team.”, Bucky introduced and Tony moved his hand forward. Daniel shook it with a small smile.

“ You’re the one who is giving Ross a headache huh. You are definitely invited to the party.”, he left as quickly as he came in. Daniel looked at Bucky in confusion. A birthday, he has never been to a birthday party before. What should he do? Grandma refused to celebrate hers so he has no idea what he is getting into.

“ We can go together then. It’d be fun.”, Nat said to him. When they left, he looked for his phone, which was placed neatly on the side stand. He quickly dialed a number and waited.

“ Hello Daniel, how are you?”, Annie Jenkins’ voice boomed in the speaker.

“ Hey Grandma, I am good. Quick question, what do you give a three year old at her birthday?”, he asked, because if he is going to a birthday party, he needs a present.

* * *

It wasn’t like any other party that he has seen on TV. Its...there is only one word for it, grand. It was a grand party. There was a children’s playground set up inside a big hall, adults hanging out on the balcony. No alcohol but other fun stuff without it, lots of food on trays. There were waiters and music was playing. Daniel decided that he liked birthday parties.

When Nat came to pick him up, he was dressed in his normal attire, t-shirt and old raggedy jeans. Nat sighed and then opened his wardrobe. She discarded everything that was in it and then dragged him to get new clothes, because ‘this isn’t what you wear to Tony’s party Danny.’ was a reason for shopping.

So it was useless to say they were slightly late. He was feeling uncomfortable in the dinner jacket Natasha forced him to buy because apparently, it popped his eyes. But he had glared at the mention of bow tie. He is not tying that shiny ribbon around his neck, no way.

“ Don’t you look nice”, Bucky noticed first. Steve gave him a look but didn’t say anything. He was still mad, obviously. But Bucky said he will be fine soon, so he is holding to that. Steve and Nat went to meet someone at the entrance leaving him with Bucky. He was dressed in a blue suit, a small present in his hand.

“ You look great.”, Daniel complimented his father, who blushed adorably.

“ So, who is Morgan?”, Daniel looked into the bunch of kids screaming and playing.

“ C’mon I’ll introduce you.”, but before they could walk further, a small speeding bundle crashed between Daniel’s legs and they both fell on the ground. A woman came in a hurry and picked up the boy.

“ I am so sorry. Are you okay?”, she asked wincing. Daniel showed thumbs up, still unable to get up after the kid almost smashed his balls inside.

“ Nate, say sorry.”, the kid said sorry and then ran away again, her mother standing apologetic. Bucky gave him a hand and he stood up, his jacket and trousers all mussed up. He saw Loki behind the woman, smirking at him.

Great! Alien mischief Gods trying to ruin his newly bought suit. Bucky finally let go and laughed.

“ It’s alright, wasn’t your fault Ma’am.”, he glared at Loki though, who walked away in his criminally beautiful black suit and greenish gold formal scarf.

For the love of God, stay focused Daniel. This isn’t the time to admire enemy’s beauty.

They reached to Tony and Pepper, offering them smiles and exchanging their greetings. The little girl pulled on Bucky’s jacket and he picked her up.

“ How’s my little hurricane?”, Morgan laughed and kissed him on the cheek. Daniel got lost in that scene. This is what he could’ve had. He saw how good Bucky was with Morgan, automatically smiling. He gave her his gift and then Morgan looked at Daniel, her big brown eyes curious.

“ Morgan, this is my friend Daniel.”, she smiled but then raised her hand in front of him, palm waiting for her present.

“ Honey, what are you doing?”, Pepper said, slightly embarrassed at her daughter’s antics.

“ Mommy, there are only two days in the whole year when I can logically ask for presents.”, Morgan’s serious tone made everyone laugh. Daniel was slightly impressed by the amazing vocabulary of a three year old.

“ Logically huh? Then here you go, happy birthday Morgan.”, Daniel took out a box and gave it to her. He asked her to open it because his gift wasn’t sturdy like everyone else’. Morgan devoured the wrapping paper like any three year old would and opened the box. There was small flower crown inside, made up of real flowers, mostly pink and white but with accents of violet and red. Morgan gaped after seeing the present.

“ A flower crown, it’s so pretty.”, she kissed Daniel on the cheek too, and then ran away to show it to her friends wearing it on her head, looking like a real life princess with the glittery dress she wore. Daniel grinned, so happy that he asked Grandma for help. There was nothing he could bring that she didn’t already possess. So, when Grandma asked him to get a flower crown, he did without hesitation. He was so proud at the flower arrangement that he chose himself.

“ Well, I am going to allow that. You topped my present and every other present on that table.”, Tony looked at Morgan, who was jumping with the crown. The couple left to attend other guests.

“ Nicely done.”, Bucky said smiling.

“ It wasn’t that original.”, Daniel jumped at the sudden voice in his ears. Loki was standing by his side. He pointed at Morgan, who was standing on the top of stairs, pretending to do a royal entrance, while her friends clapped.

“ I don’t think so.”, Daniel was wearing a smug expression that was getting on Loki’s nerves.

“ He is just being a sourpuss coz Tony confiscated his gift.”, Bucky chimed in.

“ Every child needs a pet. I would’ve given anything to have my own pet snake when I was young.”, Loki grumbled and Daniel widened his eyes.

“ You got Morgan a snake? What is wrong with you?”, Loki shrugged, clearly thinking it wasn’t a big deal. He put a spell on it so that it wouldn’t be dangerous to baby Stark but obviously he can’t tell them that. They would ring to his oaf of a brother and send him back to Asgard.

The party was a success. There was a group of people dancing in the centre. Daniel smiled so wide when Steve practically begged Bucky to dance. You can’t always see Captain America goofing around like this so Daniel was taking a video on his phone.

“ You killed Strucker.”, Daniel looked at Loki, who for some reason was still standing with him.

“ I had my orders.”, Daniel said. He could see the wheels rotating in Loki’s head.

“ I didn’t help you with that case just so you could murder people in cold blood. These people giving you orders, who are they?”, Daniel scoffed.

“ As far as murder in cold blood goes, you are a very shiny example for that. The people giving me orders are everywhere, even in this party. So how about you put on your best behavior and I don’t get you exiled again.”, Daniel smirked but Loki was staring blankly. Without even saying a word, he left. Daniel couldn’t help but feel bad. He knows the murder thing was a low blow. But he was ruining the first birthday party he ever got invited to. He shook his head and saw Peter, who was coming to him in full speed.

“ Come on! They are gonna play Diplo. We gotta dance.”, and before Daniel could understand what s happening, he was dragged in the middle of the dance floor.

“ What is gotten into you Webster?”, Daniel laughed, because he doesn’t dance. He has never danced in his life ever. And now he is standing in the middle with Peter and his girlfriend MJ, who is wonderfully weird and quirky. And then Morgan joined Peter and then before he could even blink, half of the avengers are on the floor, including his parents. Daniel is completely clueless what to do.

Peter is in front of him, moving flawlessly to the beat. Even Tony Stark knows tap dancing and Pepper is so graceful. Natasha is dancing with Dr. Banner who is moving awkwardly around her. Sam and Rhodey are involved in some sort of dance off. Then there are his parents, who are doing some lindy hop fusion with hip hop and it still looks good because their chemistry is impeccable.

And then they are kissing and Daniel flips his head back so fast, he gives himself a whiplash.

“ Why are you so stiff? Loosen up a little. Trust me, with our jobs, it doesn’t get better than this.”, Peter chuckled and Daniel still haven’t moved even once, not even an awkward step here and there.

“ I can’t, I don’t know how.”, he looks so embarrassed. He has no idea if it’s rude to just bail the floor and sit on the corner. Damn you Hydra!

But then Peter held both his hands and made him move and it’s life changing. Peter winks at MJ, who takes his place with Morgan.

“ Just follow my lead.”, and Daniel did. It feels..it feels exhilarating. The music, the rhythmic tapping of feet, Peter’s sheer enthusiasm is infectious. He didn’t even realise when Peter let his hands free. He was so engrossed in it. It felt good to move his body without control. It’s no training, no counting and jumps. It’s just fun. Daniel never did anything just for fun before like this. They were all doing some group thing now, and he joined in too. They were exchanging partners and he was dancing with Steve, suddenly back to the real world. Daniel’s smile was gone and he looked down, awkwardly completely the moves. It was when Steve fully smiled at him that he took a breath of relief.

“ I am sorry Cap. I really am.”, Daniel smiled in return.

“ It’s all forgotten. I might’ve done the same y’know.”, Steve said. Someone tapped on his shoulder though.

“ May I?”, Daniel froze to see Loki on the dance floor. Steve happily let go and now Loki was dancing with him. He moved with that royal confidence that you expect from a prince. And he was close, way too close. Daniel could feel his breath on his chin.

For a second, Daniel thinks about kissing him, because he is beautiful. Deadly, but beautiful.

“ Is this good behavior for them? Should I keep going?”, Loki asks. Daniel feels his throat dry a little. That whisper was seductive and he knows nothing good is going to come out of it. He just doesn’t have any countermeasure for this move. Hydra didn’t prepare him for this. Loki wasn’t even touching him and he could feel the pin pricks in his body. What kind of torture is this? Something flickers in Loki’s eyes, as if he understood.

“ Let go, for once let yourself go.”, he says this time. Daniel could see him struggling, trying to maintain his mask of indifference.

“ I will if you will.”, Daniel said without even knowing what it means. And Loki smiled, a vulnerable small show of teeth, as if he feels it’s a crime to show that part of him. Unknowingly, they get closer, their hands meet and they sway. The music slowed and the world seemed slower like this.

Daniel doesn’t know how much time went like this. It felt good, whatever this was. He could feel Bucky’s eyes on them, but he just doesn’t seem to care. A faint voice in his head is telling him to abandon this. Because Loki is the guy you should be running from, not running into. They are almost the same height. They look into each other’s eyes easily.

And Daniel wants this moment to seize right here.

* * *

**Loki’s P.O.V.**

It was an adorable gift. He didn’t expect the sneaky double agent to be so charming. It was painstakingly sweet, his effort to create the floral wreath for baby Stark. Loki even felt a little bad now, for messing with him when he came in. But his suit was so perfect, hugging on all the right places that Loki couldn’t help but ruin it for his own good. He had to remind himself that he is the enemy. He is the naive boy, who is lying from the day he came into his home.

Yeah, sue him. He thinks this tower is his home.

It’s way better than his real home. And _way way_ better than his _real real_ home, which is the alien version of the Antarctic. At least, he is free from the daily jabs of Asgardian population. He fits here perfectly. Nobody is perfect here. Even heroes of this planet have flaws. They are human to the core. No one expects him to be the golden boy, the prince or anything else. He is just Loki here.

And all of this wouldn’t have happened without Bucky. After a long time, he has a friend who is completely his own. Not Thor’s extended part time friends, his own. And he is possessive of this big achievement.

Which is why, he needs to know what Daniel’s motives are. Because no matter how beautiful his eyes are, no matter how his smile charms everyone, how his ass is just the perfect amount of..

Okay..too much detailed observation Loki. Stop it right this instant.

Nothing checks out. His file, his records, Loki is sure they are all a lie. He isn’t sure if his tracks are covered by Shield or himself. But it’s impressive.

The party sure came at opportune time. He could actually find some answers if the guy is drunk. At least that’s what he thought when he saw him dancing..like that, like he had never danced before.

But when he joined him, he could feel the happiness radiating from him. He was just so happy and Loki’s heart ached because when was the last time he was happy..like this. Like a child in candy land. He can’t even remember.

So its natural he wants to ruin it. That’s who he is right? Master of lies, a trickster, God of mischief.

“ Is this good behavior for them? Should I keep going?”, Loki meant it as a game starter, like they do usually. They dodge questions and instead of answering, they contort it into some kind of verbal weaponry. But this time, Daniel didn’t answer. He was looking at him with so much focus, yet failing. Loki saw him fighting for control and he knows this all too well. He did that for hundreds of years in his life.

“ Let go, for once let yourself go.”, he says this time. He is wavering in his own motive.

“ I will, if you will.”, and just like that, he is won over. Does he even know what he is doing, the mortal? He looks so unsure, yet so firm on his decision. So they dance and move in sync as if they practiced it million times before. Loki knows he is exaggerating, because it is impossible to know someone just like this.

And turns out, he is right.

Because when his hand reached his injured shoulder, he squeezed the flesh a little. Daniel didn’t wince. He kept looking into his eyes, which were back to their old self. Loki didn’t remove his hand, while Daniel tried to figure out what changed.

And just like that, it all shattered. The brief flicker of happiness, the feeling of warmth you get in someone’s embrace, all gone. Loki huffed, because he is such a fool to believe something like this even exists. After all these years, he is still so naive and easy.

This man in front of him isn’t human.

Humans don’t heal form their gunshot wounds in two days. And Daniel didn’t even bleed, after exerting himself so much at this party. He could see his clean shirt inside the jacket. It all leaves him to one conclusion. He isn’t fully human. He needs to finds out the truth.

So he put his smile back on, this time with much more mischievous glint and made sure Daniel would buy it. He moved him away from the party, to the hallways. Everyone was at the feast. It would be easier today. He reached the hallway where Daniel’s room was. Friday doesn’t have access into the employee rooms for privacy, not until someone calls her for assistance.

It’s time for his final plan.

He needs to get him inside the room because his own isn’t surveillance free. His war crimes have deprived his privacy in this tower. He needs discretion if he wants to confront him.

“ I am sorry about earlier. It was out of line.”, Daniel said and smiled a little. Loki groaned internally because he isn’t lying this time. It would’ve been better if he did. Because then, what he is going to do next will be easier.

“ I called you a murderer first so it’s even I guess. How about we talk?”, he pointed to the door and Daniel took out his key. They went inside. But Daniel put the key back in and locked the room.

“ If you wanted to interrogate me you could’ve just asked. There was no need to pretend that you actually care.”, he whispered and Loki sighed. But Daniel has left him no choice.

“ And you would’ve come quietly? Because we can still do that. You tell me the truth and there will be no interrogation.”, Loki came close again, but not like they were moments ago. It was like Daniel was on the quinjet again. He revisited his evening, figuring out where he slipped. He then touched his shoulder and eyed Loki. He is getting reckless by the day.

“ No interrogation, but there will be consequences.”, Daniel said in return. His eyes were blank again and if the situation was different, Loki would’ve admired that quality in a man.

“ Are you threatening me? Again?”, Loki asked, eyes fixed on his face.

“ No! That is what you need to understand. I am not a threat for Bucky or you, or anyone else. I am here to help.”, Daniel let his desperation slip into his voice because fuck it. He can’t lose his parents again. He just can’t.

“ Who are you?”, Loki asked again, adamant this time.

“ Loki please.”, Daniel took a step back.

“ Mortals don’t heal overnight Agent Ferrero so let me rephrase that question. What are you?”, Daniel closed his eyes.

“ I can’t tell you that. You need to trust me.”, he tried again.

He couldn’t see where the attack came from. A force threw him back into the wall and he landed on his side.

“ Liars only trust other liars if they tell the truth, how ironic.”, Loki hissed and threw him again. This time he landed on his back.

“ Whatever you are, you are not human. The only reason you are still here is because you know my secret. But I don’t care anymore. I am a maniac anyway. They wouldn’t think any less of me than they already do. So I am asking you one last time, tell me the truth.”, Loki spat those words in anger. Daniel stood up.

“ Or what? You will kill me?”, Daniel started coming close and Loki didn’t lower his hand that was ready for another attack. He is not going to fall for another trick. They kept staring at each other for a while and then Loki lowered his hand.

“ That’s what I thought. Liars know when other liars are bluffing. I _know_ you Loki...just like you know _me_.”, he said.

It was always his weakness. He can’t let people know what is inside of him. How wounded his soul is. Which is why, he lost control after hearing those words. He attacked him but Daniel dodged it this time. Great, now he knows his pattern. He threw his body into Loki with full force, landing on top of him. He punched him right in the jaw but Loki held the second one following. He twisted his hand and then turned himself on top of him, getting his dagger out and putting it on his neck. Daniel smirked and Loki saw his gun placed in his side.

“ You went to a birthday party with a gun?”, Loki scoffed.

“ And you came with a knife, so none of us have that moral high ground.”, Daniel huffed.

“ I know, which is why I am terribly sorry for this.”, Loki said and placed his hand on his forehead, making Daniel immovable. He closed his eyes and focussed. And then he saw it all.

The pain, the glass tube, the cold, the deaths, murders, an old woman, murders again, a girl and a file.

He took his hand away and the second Daniel was able to move he punched him again, this time without holding himself back. He dragged himself away from Loki, who was still sitting on the ground.

“ What did you do? What the hell did you to me?”, Daniel couldn’t control his breath. It felt like he was back in the tube again. He couldn’t move, couldn’t control his body again. He aimed his gun at Loki’s forehead, who was still staring at the ground.

“ You killed them, all of them.”, he whispered. Daniel tightened his grip on the gun.

“ I don’t know what you are talking about.”, he said but Loki stood up.

“ I saw it, your memories.”, Daniel didn’t let him continue and swung his gun again. Loki didn’t fight back though.

“ How dare you?”, Daniel was enraged now. Loki raised his hands in surrender.

“ I am sorry, for what I did to you..and for what _they_ did to you.”, Daniel’s hand started to shake. He didn’t need it from Loki, but it still felt good. Loki came closer and then took the gun from his hand. Daniel let him because he is exhausted from all the lies and deception. He doesn’t want to do it anymore but he is selfish. He is starved and he wants to get all that he could from his family.

His legs gave up all of a sudden and he is falling. If anyone told him few days ago that Loki will be the one to catch him, he would’ve called them mad. Because here he is, a pathetic mess lying in his grip, which is stronger than it was on the dance floor.

“ I had to..I..I had no choice. I don’t know how else..I don’t know anything else but to kill.” He said frantically and Loki was speechless. Some silver tongue he is.

It took a long time before Daniel composed himself again. He removed himself from Loki’s hold and sat on the ground. They didn’t say anything for a while.

“ You should tell them. You don’t know how much Bucky wants this, a kid of his own. The Captain will be overjoyed.”, Loki said.

“ And what would he say when I’ll tell him, that the man he is looking for is his own son? Will he be overjoyed then?”, Daniel said, looking lifeless.

“ No, but he will understand. He understood your father didn’t he.”, Loki tried again.

“ My father is a survivor. He is nothing like me.”, Loki didn’t say anything more. He knows the drill. No one can make him understand. This isn’t the right time. He has learned enough from his own mistakes to know.

“ Are you going to tell them? Report me?”, he wasn’t looking at Loki, but his nervous energy was making him fidget. After a while, Loki answered.

“ No, you should tell them, when the time is right. Till then, this liar is going to trust the other liar.”, this time Daniel looked at him and Loki smiled.

“ A terrible decision.”, Daniel smiled in return.

“ Eh, my reputation is practically made of horrible decisions. One more can’t hurt right.”, Loki gave him his hand and they stood up.

“ Thank you. It’s a relief to share this weight with someone.”, Daniel said in a genuine voice.

“ Don’t get too comfortable. I _am_ the trickster after all.”, Loki walked away, flipping his wrist to open the lock of his door.

“ I think you aren’t that bad.”, Daniel smirked and the door closed. And he meant it. He has a good feeling about this.

He just hopes Loki thinks so too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yayy!!!! I have too much in mind for their romance. Let's see how much makes it into the chapters though. Next will be about a lot of Stucky feels.  
> (Also, I will be updating other stories soon.)


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